In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development

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In recent times, data shows that the highest proportion of the population in many countries belonged to the elderly. Some consider it beneficial for societies,

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some

other

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others

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lay

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claim that it could be difficult for governments to deal with

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condition. The in-depth analysis in the following paragraphs intends to discuss why

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essay explores the negative points of the ageing communities outweigh the positive points. Having old people in societies would obviously have some benefits. The elderly have been living a life which is filled with many noticeable experiences, so they could use the knowledge for the benefit of their communities. Take politics as an example, authorities mostly are individuals who have enough experience and knowledge that they have earned

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over

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many years. It means that having

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option for a government would be absolutely useful based on the

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that they are aware of various policies, rules, and regulations which youngsters might not know or even

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migth

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might

not care about at all.

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, some drawbacks cannot be ignored. As it is obvious,

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age group need more healthcare

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as medicines, equipped hospitals, and powerful doctors. Not only does

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require a considerable amount of budget, but

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needs work labourers.

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this

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could be challenging for governments to provide it.

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this

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group are only consumers, they are unable to affect the economic or growth domestic production(GDP) of their countries. A clear example is farming, most of the farmers are experienced ones who have enough information about how to produce products like vegetables. As soon as

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they are unable to work, they would be consumers. After scrutinizing both sides, what can be concluded is that

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the elderly people would be beneficial for the governments, because of all the costs they make for societies in general, they cannot be advantageous.

Submitted by royakarimi435 on Sat Mar 02 2024

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task achievement

Ensure your essay precisely addresses the prompt. The given essay does not directly tackle the topic of rural-urban migration but instead discusses the implications of an aging population. Focusing closely on the question asked is crucial for a higher Task Achievement score.

coherence cohesion

Develop a logical structure by clearly stating your thesis in the introduction, following this with paragraphs that support your argument, and concluding with a succinct summary of your views. Additionally, transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the flow of your essay.

task achievement

While you have mentioned examples, aiming for clear, directly relevant examples that firmly support your main point will enhance the clarity and persuasiveness of your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
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meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

The leaders or directors of organizations are often elderly people. However some say that young people can also take the lead of organisations or companies. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Ordinary people copy famous people whome they see on TV and magazines. Do you think this is a positive development?

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What can be done to solve this problem?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?