Weddings are more expensive in many countries nowadays when compared to the past . What is the reason behind this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Currently,

weddings

Use synonyms

spend more much budget in some countries if we compare how these events were conducted in the past.

This

Linking Words

issue is a negative development, and I strongly believe that it was

due to

Linking Words

individuals' lifestyles and how big dreams and expectations of the couple regarding their wedding.

Firstly

Linking Words

, currently, many

people

Use synonyms

tend to spend their money on wedding

Use synonyms

party was

Wrong verb form

parties

show examples

due to

Linking Words

their lifestyle. Individuals

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

have a

high standard

Add a hyphen

high-standard

show examples

lifestyle prefer to create an extraordinary wedding

party

Use synonyms

for the public.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it will allocate a lot of money, it is not necessary. Because they aim to show their economic status and impress the public with how wonderful the

party

Use synonyms

was conducted by wealthy families.

As a result

Linking Words

, they tend to choose many expensive staffs that are served by vendors or purchase these items from supermarkets.

For example

Linking Words

, individuals who come from rich families as CEO families tend to purchase high-quality wedding dresses at the highest price from designers or popular supermarkets or stores. They

also

Linking Words

usually prefer great quality decorating services which

requires

Change the verb form

require

show examples

expensive prices.

Secondly

Linking Words

, conducting expensive

weddings

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

caused by how big expectations of the couple over their wedding

party

Use synonyms

. The majority of

people

Use synonyms

think that a wedding is the type of event

that is

Linking Words

conducted once only during

entire

Correct pronoun usage

their entire

show examples

life. They want to hold a perfect wedding

party

Use synonyms

which will become valuable memories in their life.

That is

Linking Words

why couples tend to purchase the perfect concepts for their

weddings

Use synonyms

to provide

Correct article usage

the

show examples

greatest memorable

party

Use synonyms

. They are often inspired by several concepts in Disney cartoons, namely princess concept-setting wedding. It requires a variety

decoration

Change preposition

of decoration

show examples

elements to be arranged in their wedding.

For example

Linking Words

artists

Fix the agreement mistake

artist

show examples

called Rachel Venya

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

inspired by the

snow white

Add a hyphen

snow-white

show examples

princess stories,

then

Linking Words

she implemented a concept from

this

Linking Words

story which needs many kinds of stuff. Genuinely, it will enhance the number of budgets.

To conclude

Linking Words

, as mentioned earlier, the majority of

people

Use synonyms

tend to build an expensive wedding

due to

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

's lifestyle and how big dreams and expectations from

couple's

Change noun form

couples'

show examples

weddings

Use synonyms

. It is

such

Linking Words

a negative development which raises folk's consumptive character.

ru.kabiru.biru

Mar 2, 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure clear paragraphing, separating your introduction, body, and conclusion more distinctly to enhance readability.

coherence cohesion

Enhance your essay by actively linking your ideas within and across paragraphs using a wider range of linking words.

task achievement

Address the reasons and the implications of the problem in depth, offering a balanced view and noting any potential positive aspects, to fully respond to all parts of the task.

task achievement

Incorporate specific, detailed examples to solidify your arguments. This could involve citing statistics, trends, or notable events related to the cost of weddings.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

353 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

societal expectations
grand weddings
social media platforms
extravagant ceremonies
benchmark
commercialization
wedding planners
destination weddings
designer dresses
professional photographers
videographers
inflation
cost of goods and services
venues
catering
décor
personalization
customization
unique venues
intricate themes
specialized entertainment
guest lists
familial pressures

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Weddings are more expensive in many countries nowadays when compared to the past . What is the reason behind this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

Today people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some say that music, art, and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are these problems and how could they be reduced?

Many teenagers now have their smartphones. What are the advantages and disadvantages