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Band 5

Some say that the best way to help poor countries is financial aids. Other say other forms of aid should be given. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#say #countries #aids #forms #aid
Some
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
 believe that giving financial
aids
Fix the agreement mistake
aid
show examples
 to poor countries is a good way to help them. Others,
however
, deem that there are other kinds of aid which can sum up against poor nations' plight. In
this
 essay, we will analyse these two different points of view and
then
, my opinion will be given. One of the most
difunded
Correct your spelling
difficult
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
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 to solve some
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
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 is investing
money
on
Change preposition
in
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 measures which are capable
for
Change preposition
of
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 decreasing bad circumstances.
For example
, if a country is suffering
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of water, others can send them an amount to finance pit
constructions
Fix the agreement mistake
construction
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. It is a measure which
have
Change the verb form
has
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 practical effects on the
reallity
Correct your spelling
reality
 and because of that, many
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
 believe that it is the best way to deal with
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
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.
On the other hand
, advocates of helping others with another kind of aid, say that in many cases, giving
money
 is not the best solution. For them, several times
this
 financial help does not achieve the real
propose
Correct your spelling
purpose
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 because of the corruption engrained in the local management. Because of
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
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, most of
this
money
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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 lost and
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
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do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
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 not
arrives
Correct subject-verb agreement
arrive
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Change preposition
at
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in
Change preposition
at
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 its destination, which in fact is a huge problem faced by underdeveloped nations.
Moreover
, aids have to be thought to achieve the root of the problem and
than
Replace the word
then
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,
making
Wrong verb form
make
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 it be ceased.
For instance
, in places where are
accurring
Correct your spelling
occurring
 war, humanitarian aids are much more positive than giving them
money
.
To conclude
, it is possible to note that both points of view have their motivations to believe that they have the best solution. In my opinion,
nonetheless
, the measure to be taken depends on each case. We have to look
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 each reality and see the possibilities and how the aid can provide an effective impact on the circumstance.
Submitted by carinabmurakami on

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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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general
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general
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