Today people do less exercise. Some people believe that conducting sporting events such as the Olympics or World Cup encourage people to live healthy while others indicate that there are various other methods to remain healthy. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

#people #exercise #events #olympics #world #cup #methods

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Sport is one of the essential elements of our lives which lead people to a healthy and happy life. With the help of physical activity,both adults and young people get fit and

also

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stay positive more than those who

donot

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do not

do exercise at all. We all know that

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apply

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those who are active and fit are

also

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happier and more satisfied with their lives.

According to

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some

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In some

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communities, sporting activities held at the Olympic games are extremely important as they motivate individuals to be healthy. I agree with

this

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view up to a point. In my humble opinion, sportsmen who take part in

such

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sporting events tend to spend most of their time in gyms and sports centres. But it is

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stressful and exhausting. Those who see them working out all the time can not see the advantages of

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sporting occasions. I have a very close friend of mine, who used to be a professional wrestler and had to quit

sport

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the sport

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because of the health problems she had during her training. So

this

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does not encourage at all. There are communities that think

viceversa

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vice versa

vice-versa

. Fortunately, they show us other

waysof

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ways of

way of

staying healthy

suchas

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such as

keeping a

healthydiet

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healthy diet

, meditation and quality sleep. The individuals who eat healthy food with needed portions of vitamins will

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affect our health as same as doing sport. As for meditation, it is significantly meaningful not only to our body but

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to our mental state.

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, I believe that all the things we do to our body should give only positive

feelingsand

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feelings and

feelings

have to be taken into account each person's needs.

Thus

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, I can assume that using all the advice given to improve a healthy lifestyle should be examined individually taking each person's state into consideration.

Submitted by ali_naz on Sat Mar 02 2024

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task achievement

Your essay reflects an understanding of the topic and attempts to discuss both views along with providing your own opinion. However, it needs more clarity and depth in terms of examples and elaboration. Incorporating more specific examples to support your points would make your argument more compelling.

coherence cohesion

To improve the structure of your essay, ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within it directly support that idea. Introduce your essay with a more explicit statement explaining what will be discussed and conclude with a summary that reinforces your main points. This will enhance the coherence and cohesion of your text.

task achievement

It's crucial to fully address all parts of the task. Although you discuss both views and your own opinion, make sure to develop each point thoroughly. This includes providing more detailed discussion and analysis, which will help achieve a complete response to the question asked.

coherence cohesion

Improve paragraph transitions by using more varied and clear linking words or phrases. This will help guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly and strengthen the cohesion of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

10 paragraphs

291 words

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Today people do less exercise. Some people believe that conducting sporting events such as the Olympics or World Cup encourage people to live healthy while others indicate that there are various other methods to remain healthy. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that the extended family is not as important now as it once was. Others think that its worth has not changed because people always need help from their family members. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Completing university is the best way to get a job. while others believe that experience and developing soft skills is more important. discuss both views and give your opinion

in many countries, people live longer and longer. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?