Young people who commit serious crimes should be punished in the same way as adults. To want extent do you agree or disagree?

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the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society advances, it is disagreed by many that criminal charges against a teen should carry the same penalty as that of an adult. Examining the fact that they are still kids under the

guidience

Correct your spelling

guidance

of their parents without any

responsiblities

Correct your spelling

responsibilities

and that their immature minds

Change the verb form

are

show examples

too young to understand the gravity of

such

Linking Words

Use synonyms

crime

Correct article usage

a crime

show examples

will give a comprehensive understanding of

this

Linking Words

subject matter.

To begin

Linking Words

with, Children are still under

guidience

Correct your spelling

guidance

and have no

sociatial

Correct your spelling

societal

social

obligation.

For instance

Linking Words

, in Nigeria most of the teens arrested for cultism thought it was a social group they could dress up in

unifroms

Correct your spelling

uniforms

and catch fun,

Linking Words

Correct word choice

but at

show examples

the end of the day, they just wanted to go home to their parents. Clearly, they would not have

join

Change the verb form

joined

show examples

those cult groups if they were adults because they

will

Wrong verb form

would

show examples

know

its

Replace the word

it's

it is

show examples

not a social club.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it is clear a child can not intentionally commit a

crime

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

an adult would do

otherwise

Linking Words

In addition

Linking Words

, their maturity is low so can not grasp the consequences of their actions.

For example

Linking Words

, in Enugu state,

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

jail time is the

penelty

Correct your spelling

penalty

for an accident with

fatality

Add an article

a fatality

show examples

, teens are mostly

invovled

Correct your spelling

involved

this

Linking Words

type of accident because they are ignorant,

moreover

Linking Words

, no one will want to spend time behind bars intentionally. Obviously, they

will

Wrong verb form

would

show examples

not want jail time history if they were adults and completely

understands

Wrong verb form

understood

show examples

the consequences of

such

Linking Words

Use synonyms

crime

Correct article usage

a crime

show examples

Wherefore

Correct your spelling

Therefore

show examples

, we can see that teenagers will not carelessly cause a fatal accident if they understand the outcome. In conclusion, the fact that a

teanager's

Correct your spelling

teenager's

crime

Use synonyms

should carry the same sentence as that of an adult is an idea that has been disagreed on by many individuals. Since they are still immature so not completely aware of the gravity of their actions and they are children still under the care of their parents with

any

Correct determiner usage

show examples

social

responsiblities

Correct your spelling

responsibilities

Consequently

Linking Words

, it is obvious that a child's

crime

Use synonyms

should not carry the same punishment as that of

Change the article

show examples

matured

Replace the word

mature

show examples

person.

Submitted by Eby on Sat Mar 02 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Work on developing a broader range of sentence structures to enhance readability and demonstrate language proficiency.

Coherence and Cohesion

Improve paragraphing by ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea and is logically connected to the overall argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Introduce a wider variety of linking words and phrases to smoothly connect ideas and paragraphs.

Task Achievement

Ensure that the introduction clearly presents your stance on the topic, and that the conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments made.

Task Achievement

Enhance task response by providing more detailed examples, and ensure that these examples are directly relevant to the argument being made.

Task Achievement

Avoid overly generalized statements. Instead, use specific, detailed reasons and examples to support your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Age of criminal responsibility
Juvenile delinquency
Brain plasticity
Culpability
Recidivism
Deterrence
Rehabilitative approach
Penal system
Capital offense
Minor
Mitigating factors
Precedent
Youthful offender
Heinous crime
Restorative justice
Moral compass
Peer influence
Socio-economic factors

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Young people who commit serious crimes should be punished in the same way as adults. To want extent do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, can/should be done about it?

Nowadays people use bicycles less as a form of transport. Why is this the case? What can we do to encourage people to use bicycles more? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In some countries, many people suffer from health problems due to eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that schools should invest more money in technology, such as more computers, while others think more money should be spent on teachers. Discuss both views and give your opinion.