IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

THE INCREASING AVAILABILITY OF LOW-COSTING AIRLINES NOW LETS PEOPLE TRAVEL AROUND THE WORLD. SOME FEEL THIS IS A POSITIVE DEVELOPMENT WHILE OTHERS THINK THAT IS NEGATIVE OVERALL.

#availability #airlines #people #travel #world #feel #development
THE INCREASING AVAILABILITY OF LOW-COSTING AIRLINES NOW LETS PEOPLE TRAVEL AROUND THE WORLD. SOME FEEL
THIS
 IS A POSITIVE DEVELOPMENT
WHILE
 OTHERS THINK
THAT IS
 NEGATIVE
OVERALL
. Nowadays, more citizens have been travelling in any distance of the world
due to
 affordable
cost
 opportunities. Some consider
this
 as a great opportunity to travel
WHILE
 others have
opposite
Add an article
an opposite
show examples
 side in
this
 view. There are various reasons why enhancing
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
 of cheap airlines has
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
 effect on society. First of all, affordable
cost
 airlines might be boosted
budget
Add an article
the budget
show examples
 of
airocompanies
Correct your spelling
air companies
 on account of travel abroad with relative ease.
Thus
, most less affluent citizens would be able to great amenities for rising
great
Correct article usage
a great
show examples
 deal of their horizon.
Moreover
,
low
Add a hyphen
low-cost
show examples
cost
 transportation must increase
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
tourism aspects and help economic well-being.
For example
, from a ticket
cost
 may be reasonable, aeroplanes
delivers
Change the verb form
deliver
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 hour faster than
Add an article
a car
the car
show examples
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
 and it makes
possible
Correct pronoun usage
it possible
show examples
 to create enjoyments to choice.
On the other hand
, acceptable plane tickets have
lead
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 to
bring
Verb problem
apply
show examples
negative despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overcrowding or unsatisfactory service availability. It seems that flights may
as
Rephrase
also
show examples
 well
delays
Replace the word
delayed
show examples
since
Change preposition
due to
show examples
 uncontrolled
individual's
Change noun form
individual
show examples
 capacity or congestion.
To sum up
,
Correct article usage
an increased
show examples
increased
Correct article usage
an increased
show examples
Add a hyphen
low-pricing
show examples
low pricing
Add a hyphen
low-pricing
show examples
Correct your spelling
plan
show examples
plane
Correct your spelling
plan
show examples
 provides
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
beneficial aspects like economic advantages,
Correct word choice
and tourist's
show examples
Correct word choice
and tourist's
show examples
Change noun form
tourist
show examples
tourist's
Change noun form
tourist
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
, but it can lead
Change preposition
to drawbacks
show examples
drawbacks
Change preposition
to drawbacks
show examples
due to
 overcrowded and low customer service.
Submitted by temurbekberdiyev78 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure your introduction provides a clear statement of your position or thesis. This will help readers understand your viewpoint from the beginning.
task achievement
Work on developing your ideas more fully with relevant examples. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, followed by explanations or examples that support it.
coherence and cohesion
Improve your writing's logical structure by clearly organizing your essay into paragraphs that each focus on a single main idea. Use transition words to help guide the reader through your argument.
coherence and cohesion
In the conclusion, clearly state your overall standpoint again, summarizing how your arguments support this view. A strong conclusion reinforces your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Accessibility
  • Affordability
  • Global mobility
  • Convenience
  • Environmental impact
  • Economic benefits
  • Cultural exchange
  • Enhanced connectivity
  • Drawbacks
  • Sustainable travel
What to do next:
Look at other essays: