Some people think it is the government’s responsibility to tackle environmental issues. Others believe it is up to each individual to be environmentally responsible. Discuss both sides.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the
last
Linking Words
100 years, technology has advanced at an unprecedented rate.
Although
Linking Words
robots
Use synonyms
are already a part of our lives, experts predict that they will become even more prevalent in the coming years.
This
Linking Words
essay will outline some possible uses of
robots
Use synonyms
in the future and explain why
this
Linking Words
development will be a positive one for humanity. It is highly likely that
robots
Use synonyms
are going to play a more major role in many fields but two important ones are dangerous jobs and healthcare.
Whereas
Linking Words
currently, it is humans that are sent to war or to fight fires or explore space, in the future, these tasks could be performed by
robots
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
to
such
Linking Words
roles,
robots
Use synonyms
could
also
Linking Words
become more commonplace in hospitals and aged care facilities. Not only could they be used to perform surgery in remote locations, but, as artificial intelligence advances, they may
also
Linking Words
be able to interact with and support patients when nurses or carers are in limited supply. Indeed,
such
Linking Words
developments are already underway. Clearly, these advancements in robotics and AI will have a positive impact on society. By outsourcing hazardous tasks, human workers will be less prone to injury or death. If
robots
Use synonyms
are able to extinguish fires or disarm bombs efficiently,
society
Add an article
the society
show examples
too will be safer. In the health sector, even though some may worry that
robots
Use synonyms
lack the empathy and understanding of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
, the fact is that demand for healthcare workers exceeds supply in many places, which means there is a dire need for extra help.
This
Linking Words
demand could well be met by
robots
Use synonyms
with artificial intelligence in the decades to come. In conclusion, the potential of robotics is unimaginable.
This
Linking Words
essay discussed just a few areas in which
this
Linking Words
technology could benefit us.
While
Linking Words
some caution is needed, ultimately,
robots
Use synonyms
may enhance our lives beyond expectations.
Submitted by Haris Khan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
In terms of task response, make sure your essay directly answers the question posed by contrasting thinking about government responsibility and individual responsibility regarding environmental issues. However, you’ve described the uses and benefits of robotics, which doesn't align with the provided topic.
coherence and cohesion
Consider utilizing a wider range of linking words and cohesive devices to increase the coherence of your essay. This will help in smoothly transitioning between paragraphs and ideas, thereby enhancing readability.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, maintaining a clear and consistent paragraph structure is crucial. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, which you did well, but ensuring that all parts of your essay directly support your main argument will improve cohesiveness.
structure
Your introduction and conclusion are well-defined, setting up the topic and summarizing the main points effectively.
detail and support
You provided clear, specific examples to support your arguments, which is excellent for both task achievement and coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: