Topic: Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#topic #people #media #coverage #celebrities #effect #children

It is true that in our contemporary era, celebrities receive too much attention from the

media

For

this

reason, some

people

argue that these phenomena

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

a detrimental impact on offspring ,

while

others believe that

Correct pronoun usage

They

show examples

can be beneficial in many cases . In

this

essay , I will explicate both stances before presenting my consensus on the latter view. On the one hand, in some circumstances , It can adversely affect

children

. Since , adolescents tend to compete with each other , especially when It comes to football players.

For instance

, It can be seen everywhere how

children

are debating who is better Ronaldo or Messi and causing rivalries among them.

Nevertheless

, the public in many situations tries to encourage them to be a community by illustrating how famous

people

respect each other.

This

factor can be valuable as it transforms them into a more friendly society.

On the other hand

, the

media

coverage of icons has some benefits. Young

people

can gain some motivation and inspiration by observing high-profile individual's accomplishments.

For instance

, the

media

mostly shows how celebrities achieve their goals in the face of pressure from others.

Such

kind of news generally triggers inspiration and a desire to work hard on themselves. A good example of

this

is a Japanese youngster who was motivated by Cristiano Ronaldo when everyone was humiliating him . After 4 years,

this

player has become one of the best in Japan and

furthermore

, now he plays a pivotal role in his team. Despite all these advantages , sometimes, the

media

shows inappropriate things about famous

people

For example

, the public recently showed Dani Alves who was accused of vandalism. It can

therefore

be concluded that

media

coverage of stars can have positive and negative influence on young

children

simultaneously.

However

, I vehemently disagree that It has a more adverse effect on

children

as the

media

tend

Correct subject-verb agreement

tends

show examples

to publish things which inspire our young generation.

Submitted by ruznadir on Tue Mar 05 2024

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task response

Focus on developing a clear thesis statement that directly addresses the question. Make sure your introduction clearly indicates whether you agree or disagree with the statement.

coherence and cohesion

Enhance your argument structure by dedicating each paragraph to a distinct point of view. Consider using clearer topic sentences and more explicit transitions between ideas for improved clarity.

task response

For a higher band, work on expanding and thoroughly explaining your examples. Make sure each argument or example directly supports your main point and is fully explored.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to punctuation and grammar to ensure your essay flows well and is easily understood. Simple errors can detract from the overall quality of your essay.

task response

Deepen your analysis of the negative and positive impacts, specifically relating to the prompt's focus on children. The more relevant and detailed your examination, the stronger your essay will be.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

331 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic: Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negative effect on children. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Include an introduction and conclusion

In some cities of the world, cars are repalcing bicycles. However, in some other cities, bicycles are replacing cars. What are the reasons for these two developments. In your opinion, which one is better?

Public libraries should only provide books and should not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many students are participating in international exchange trips. Is this a positive or a negative development?

In most cities and towns, the high volumes of road traffic have become a problem. What are the causes and what actions could be taken to solve the problem?

Throughout history, people dream to live in a perfect society while they haven’t agreed what the ideal society would be like. What is the most important element you think makes a perfect society? What people do to achieve an ideal society?