People prefer high paid jobs as compared to job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?
There is a trend surrounding
people
priortizing
Correct your spelling
prioritizing
the
lucrative Correct article usage
apply
job
rather than satisfied one
. The writer of Correct pronoun usage
ones
this
essay claims due to
ensuring a sustainable life
along with
the value of living our dream
latter
, Correct your spelling
later
i
agree that it is much better to land a high paid Change the capitalization
I
jobs
.
Fix the agreement mistake
job
One
of the main reasons explain
why employees should have a lucrative Verb problem
apply
job
is how it advance
their Correct subject-verb agreement
advances
life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
That is
to say , with an
immense income they gain from their Correct article usage
the
job
, it is reasonable that this
will be used , without worrying , to improve the quality of their life
. Therefore
, not only being
capable of ensuring Verb problem
are they
the
better future , but Correct article usage
a
people
with a high paid jobs also
are likely to take care of their parents and the whole after generations .
Nevertheless
, the benefit of gainning
Correct your spelling
gaining
job
satisfaction should also
be mention
when it comes to landing a good Wrong verb form
mentioned
life
. This
is because , the
Correct article usage
apply
life
is full of ups and downs , so for
those who have Change preposition
apply
job
satisfaction are more prone to get promotions in their job
, leading to have
a highly sustainable income . Unnecessary verb
apply
Thus
, these employees will find it easy to control not only their working
quality Replace the word
work
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
their whole life
It is the writer's perspective that choosing a lucrative job
must be better
choice Add an article
a better
the better
as a result
of being able to live one
's dream
. It must be recognised that in the contemporary era , no longer do people
keep pursuading
their Correct your spelling
persuading
pursuing
dream
as there are
a Change the verb form
is
brunch
of conditions Correct your spelling
bunch
such
as socio-economic background which create a boundary to reach one
's favorite
occupation . Change the spelling
favourite
This
means , since
Correct word choice
that since
people
land a lucrative job
, it would be much better for them to idealise their dreams as they don't have to worry about funds or incomes anymore . As a result
, this
will be an opportunity for them to live with their own life
.
In conclusion , even though job
satisfaction brings a
plenty of benefits to Remove the article
apply
one
's life
, it is likely better for employees land
Fix the infinitive
to land
a
Correct article usage
apply
highpaid
jobs Correct your spelling
high paid
high-paid
due to
its ability to advance the life
quality as well as
living our dream
Submitted by 11E4 Community on
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General
Ensure clarity and precision in your writing. Avoid overly complicated sentences and strive for simplicity to enhance understanding.
Introduction/Conclusion
Work on a clearer introduction and conclusion. They should unequivocally state your position and succinctly summarize your argument.
Logical Structure
Develop a logical structure within paragraphs. Start with a topic sentence, follow with explanation or example, and conclude with a sentence that connects the idea to the main argument.
Supported Main Points
Support your main points with more detailed and relevant examples. Avoid general statements by providing specific, real-life examples or statistics.
Complete Response
Respond to the task more completely. Make sure that you address all parts of the prompt and develop a more balanced argument with a clear position throughout.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
Clarify and expand your ideas for a comprehensive understanding. Each paragraph should explore a single clear idea related to the prompt.
Relevant & Specific Examples
Incorporate real-world examples or more detailed scenarios to strengthen your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and engaging.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.