IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Several cities around the globe subscribed the idea of vertical development for residential buildings, others promtote independent houses in larger areas.

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Several
cities
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 around the globe subscribed
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 idea of vertical development for residential buildings, others
promtote
Correct your spelling
promoted
independent houses in larger areas. I believe that providing taller residential
apartments
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 is the best way for the development of
cities
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 as ample reasons are present to substantiate it.
This
Linking Words
 essay will delve into my viewpoint with relevant illustrations. First and foremost, the most attractive advantage
for
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of
show examples
 living in
apartments
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 is enabling
of
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apply
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social
life
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 compared to independent houses.
In other words
Linking Words
, multi-residential vertical
apartments
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 are
the
Correct article usage
a
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 suitable place for social
life
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 balance in the fast-paced modern
life
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.
For example
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, children and older family members feel less isolated in
apartments
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 compared to traditional homes.
Besides
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, taller
apartments
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, in general, are the
secured
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secure
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 place for living.
This
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 is because of the usage of electronic surveillance
as well as
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 security
guards service
Fix the agreement mistake
guard services
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 provided by either apartment
managements
Fix the agreement mistake
management
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 or residential associations.
As a result
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, elderly people and juveniles are secured from theft and
vilolence
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violence
.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, multi-story buildings are
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 affordable option for
middle income
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middle-income
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 people. In detail,
,
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apply
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 since
the
Correct article usage
apply
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land prices are
singnificantly
Correct your spelling
significantly
 on the increase in
cities
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, taller residential
apartments
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 are the
cost effective
Add a hyphen
cost-effective
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 way to own a home.
For example
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, In Dubai,
independant
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independent
 houses are ten times
costly
Correct quantifier usage
more costly
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 than same size
apartments
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 in skyscrapers.
In addition
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, modern facilities like sports
centers
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centres
show examples
, swimming pools and recreational areas are commonplace in modern
apartments
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 in most
cities
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. since these
facillites
Correct your spelling
facilities
 are easy to access, the physical health and mental health of the residents would significantly improve. In conclusion, affordability and social
life
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 are the advantages of taller residential homes. I prefer to live in an apartment as it has security and modern
facilites
Correct your spelling
facilities
 compared to independent homes.

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Task Achievement
Ensure your introduction provides a clear outline of what the reader can expect in the essay, including your stance on the issue.
Task Achievement
Aim to fully address the prompt by developing your main points with more depth, variety, and specificity. This includes adding more detailed examples that closely tie back to the points you are making.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on the logical flow of ideas by using a wider range of cohesive devices. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a mix of complex and simple sentences to improve readability and demonstrate linguistic range. Avoid overcomplicated sentences that may obscure your meaning.
Coherence & Cohesion
Integrate a conclusion that clearly summarizes your viewpoint and the main points discussed, ensuring it aligns with the arguments presented.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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