ome people think that visiting museums is the best way for children to learn history, while many others think there are several better ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some group of people think that exploring and visiting
museums
is the finest way to teach them history
, while
many others think there are better methods for them to learn history
. In the following essay, these opinions are going to be discussed.
First of all, nobody can deny the effect that museums
have on children
's passion for the
Correct article usage
apply
history
. You see, when I was a kid, visiting museums
with school camp
was one of the most enjoyable moments I had in my childhood, which had a Fix the agreement mistake
camps
marvelous
effect on my interest in Change the spelling
marvellous
history
. Even if children
go to Add an article
the museum
a museum
museum
with their parents, they still can learn about the culture, manners, lifestyle and many other things about Fix the agreement mistake
museums
Correct pronoun usage
their ancestors
ancestors
lives. Change noun form
ancestors'
ancestor's
However
, this
might not be the best way to encourage youngsters to history
.
On one
hand, nowadays Correct article usage
the one
children
are not as interested as before in Correct pronoun usage
their ancestors
ancestors
lives, because they live in an era Change noun form
ancestors'
ancestor's
which
technology speaks in everything. Change preposition
in which
Therefore
, visiting museums
and showing them old items from the past decades is not Rephrase
as exiting
exiting
as before. Correct your spelling
exciting
On the other hand
, this
means other ways of showing history
could be beneficial in teaching children
. For example
, 3d videos can excite them to get more knowledge in
ancient animals or playing video games about different occasions in the past decades would get their interest in these areas; "uncharted" game series are about a group of people who travel to find treasures all around world meanwhile introducing you various historical places and happenings in those ancient areas.
In conclusion, despite of many benefits and appealing aspects of visiting Change preposition
about
museums
had
in the past decades, it is time to move on to the modern, futuristic, newer ways of teaching and help Unnecessary verb
apply
young
generation to study Correct article usage
the young
about
Change preposition
apply
history
in a way which claims
their attention and interest.Verb problem
holds
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coherence cohesion
To enhance your essay, consider incorporating a wider range of cohesive devices and transitions to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This would elevate the coherence and cohesion of your work, making it easier to follow.
task achievement
For a stronger task achievement score, ensure that all parts of the prompt are fully addressed. Your essay does well in discussing both views and giving your opinion, but further elaboration on why modern methods may be more effective could deepen your response. Adding more detailed examples and explanations would also help clarify and support your ideas, making them more comprehensive.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.