Some people think that all universities students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
A number of
people
advocate that scholars should be given freedom in choosing subjects of their interest. However
, others claim in opposite stating that only STEM courses
should be introduced in higher curriculum
as these topics Fix the agreement mistake
curricula
helps
in Change the verb form
help
broadning
their career opportunities. From my perspective, both statements are right in their own way and they should be considered separately before making any conclusion.
In the first place, if pupils Correct your spelling
broadening
will be
given the right to choose their interests it will not only help them Wrong verb form
are
increasing
their cognitive development but Change the form of the verb
increase
also
gives
them inner satisfaction. They can concentrate more on their interested Correct subject-verb agreement
give
fields
. For example
; in 2022 there are near about 300 youngsters in Punjab, India became lawyers, even who
Correct determiner usage
those who
belongs
to poor Correct subject-verb agreement
belong
economical
backgrounds just by their dedication and hard work for specific Correct word choice
economic
line
. Fix the agreement mistake
lines
Therefore
, they put all their efforts in
clearing exams; which resulted in making their hard work fruitful. Change preposition
into
Moreover
, studying diverse fields
foster
learners to increase their critical thinking, creativity and Correct subject-verb agreement
fosters
problem solving
skills Add a hyphen
problem-solving
along with
decreasing pressure
of job opportunities in major Correct article usage
the pressure
fields
only. It will not easy
for young Add a missing verb
be easy
people
to be self employed
but Add a hyphen
self-employed
also
safe for official
to Fix the agreement mistake
officials
arise
employment chances.
Correct your spelling
raise
However
, other people
argue about focusing on courses
related to science and IT. Supporters of this
view, opine that there are more placement chances after getting education in such
spheres. They can demonstrate their skills better in such
fields
because of the demanding and changing nature of modern
epoch. Correct article usage
the modern
Furthermore
, jobs related to Information Technology are well paid
jobs and one can Add a hyphen
well-paid
also
work remotly
in other countries Correct your spelling
remotely
also
without travelling. To examplify
, at the time of covid; Correct your spelling
exemplify
while
, other employment opportunities were closed, the people
who were working from home were able to secure their profession. Courses
related to Science demands
great attention Correct subject-verb agreement
demand
as well as
interest in learning. Educators who are related to such
fields
can be the life savers
of a large population and bring name and fame to their country.
On weighing up all the considerations it can be asserted that with the guidance of parents and tutors, youngsters should choose their Correct your spelling
lifesavers
courses
because sometimes they can take
wrong decisions by just following their inclinations. Correct your spelling
make
However
, while
giving guidance to learners; parents should not impose their own decision
upon them and by mutual understanding subjects should be Fix the agreement mistake
decisions
choosen
for them.Correct your spelling
chosen
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coherence cohesion
Consider strengthening the logical flow between your paragraphs and within them. Use a variety of linking words effectively to ensure smoother transitions.
coherence cohesion
In your introduction, try to present a clearer thesis statement that outlines your stance and the main points you intend to discuss. This helps in setting the direction for the essay.
task achievement
To improve your task achievement score, ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task. Clearly state your opinion and consistently argue in favor of it throughout the essay, backing your views with specific examples and detailed explanations.
general
Using more varied sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary can help make your essay more engaging and express your ideas more precisely.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example