Every culture, throughout time, has recorded its history in one way or another. In what ways can history be passed on to the next generation? Why is history important to society?

#culture #time #history #generation #society

From the past, all cultures have recorded their

history

in many ways throughout time.

This

essay will discuss how we can pass to the next era and the effect of

history

for

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society.

To begin

with, we need to preserve former records as

clean

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cleanly

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passible

Correct your spelling

possible

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

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and make it

passible

Correct your spelling

possible

show examples

to show them

for

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young people. A good example is museums. These days, we can see a lot of historical records at many museums and it is one of the

way

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ways

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we can learn about

history

Further more

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Furthermore

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, speaking of our lives, we should record them by movie.

Movie

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The movie

A movie

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can convey not only facts but

also

atmosfares

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atmospheres

of cultures more than paper.

Moreover

, broadcasting about the records on TV or YouTube is

also

effective

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an effective

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way to spread historical

kowledges

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knowledge

knowledges

. Many people are not willing to study by books

voluntary

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voluntarily

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, so I believe it will work. The main important importance of

history

is that people can escape some fails.

For example

, in Japan, there a lot of region names

which are

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that

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came

Wrong verb form

come

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from certain disasters

such

earthquick

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earthquake

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tsunamis

show examples

tsunami

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tsunamis

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, and so on. Our ancients warned

its

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it's

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dangerous

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for

show examples

Correct article usage

the next

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generations and keep us from living there.

As a result

, sometimes we can live safer than before. In conclusion, we need to convey our

history

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the best way we can, and learn

history

to live our lives better.

History

is not just

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one

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of the subjects

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school, but it makes human

live

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life

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easier, so we should make efforts to tell them to

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the next

show examples

generation.

Submitted by mayu1022.p on Fri Mar 08 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion to guide the reader through your points. Avoid abrupt topic changes between paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Use paragraphing effectively to separate different ideas. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, supported by examples or explanations.

task achievement

In your body paragraphs, expand on your points by providing more specific examples and detailed explanations to support the argument. This will make your points more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Revise your essay for grammatical and spelling errors to improve clarity and professionalism. Consistent errors can distract the reader from your main points.

task achievement

Improve the sophistication of your vocabulary to more accurately convey your thoughts. This will make your essay more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

255 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

oral traditions
storytelling
preserving
manuscripts
cultural artifacts
conserving
curriculum
contemporary
documentaries
commemorate
cultural consciousness
genealogy
ancestry

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Every culture, throughout time, has recorded its history in one way or another. In what ways can history be passed on to the next generation? Why is history important to society?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, families are not as close as they used to be What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to make family close?

Online shopping is replacing shopping in stores. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, people are able to use the internet to do an increasing number of tasks. Is this a positive or negative development?

Most employers do job interviews before offering a position to a person. Do you think this is the best way to do it, or are there better alternatives? What is the best method of choosing employees in your opinion?