Some people think that stars do not deserve high salaries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #stars #salaries

this

time and era, superstars are seen on

the

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apply

show examples

social media all around the world. The modern generation takes

this

as the only source of entertainment. Different groups of

nation

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the nation

a nation

show examples

has

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have

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different perspectives on

this

. A large number of residents

believes

Correct subject-verb agreement

believe

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that

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apply

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the high payments given to the actors are unfair to

the

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apply

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society

while

, others think that, they are paid

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

amount

of dollars for their

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

. I have a balanced

view point

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viewpoint

show examples

This

essay will discuss both views.

To begin

with, millions of dollars are spent on the cinema

industries

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industry

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in order to make good films and extremely high

amount

Fix the agreement mistake

amounts

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

the

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apply

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celebrities to act in movies and shows.

Although

, the real superstars are the doctors and the teachers.

For example

, a study was conducted between doctors and famous television personalities.

As a result

health

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the health

show examples

care system is not even paid half of the

amount

earned by notable tribes.

However

, the current generation is getting attracted towards these

proffesions

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professions

in order to earn name,fame and

luxuarious

Correct your spelling

luxurious

life leaving other jobs aside.

This

empacting

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impacting

the country

negetively

Correct your spelling

negatively

. On the other side, the

view point

Correct your spelling

viewpoint

show examples

shows that

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apply

show examples

this

community is paid for their

hardwork

Correct your spelling

hard work

. The path in

this

area is not easy to achieve. These people need

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

amount

of money in order to look after their families and daily needs.

However

, they complete their education in

this

field and try hard to act best in movies by staying away from their

childeren

Correct your spelling

children

for months.

For example

Correct article usage

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

study was done on

the

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apply

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famous

heros

Correct your spelling

heroes

, the result

revieled

Correct your spelling

revealed

that, these parents can not give time to their

childeren

Correct your spelling

children

at all

and

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apply

show examples

wfich

Correct your spelling

which

further

causes

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a sensation

show examples

sensation

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a sensation

show examples

lonliness

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loneliness

in these

yongsters

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youngsters

Moreover

, to attain

such

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apply

show examples

fame and name they have to work under strict calory

defficient

Correct your spelling

efficient

diet and lifestyle.

To conclude

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should invest more money

Change preposition

show examples

educational departments rather than

film making

Correct your spelling

filmmaking

show examples

. All the jobs should be provided equally for the work done by them.

Submitted by princyheera on Mon Mar 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

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task achievement

For a higher score in task achievement, aim to provide more depth and elaboration in your examples. Specific, relevant examples that directly support your argument can vastly improve the effectiveness of your essay. Additionally, ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the task, offering a balanced discussion and clear personal stance.

coherence cohesion

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

327 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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