IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You have just read an article in an international travel magazine which contained some information about your town that is incorrect. Write a letter to the editor of the magazine. In your letter correct the information in the ahicle explain why it is important for the magazine to give correct information suggest what the magazine should do about this situation

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Sebastián Hernández, 3245648753, Bogotá D.C. Travel
magazine
Capitalize word
Magazine
show examples
 Writing department Dear
editor
Capitalize word
Editor
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 I'm writing to focus
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 some mistakes
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
 your
last
Linking Words
 publication, specifically wrong information about my town that I would like to proofread.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in your
article
Add a comma
article,
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 you are claiming that Bogotá is located
at
Change preposition
in
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 the north of the country,
that is
Linking Words
 a geographic error since Bogotá is located in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 of Colombia.
Secondly
Linking Words
, reading about
weather
Correct article usage
the weather
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 you state that people don't need to go without warm clothes
due to
Linking Words
 intense warm temperatures,
this
Linking Words
 is incorrect because Bogotá is one of the coldest communities
whereas
Linking Words
 is compulsory to go with warm clothes. As you can see, there are important fake data you are providing to the readers and active
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 decided
come
Fix the infinitive
to come
show examples
 here
in
Change preposition
on
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 behalf
your
Change preposition
of your
show examples
 article,
that is
Linking Words
 why is
crutially
Correct your spelling
crucially
critically
 important to do
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
previous research about a
place
Use synonyms
 before
formulate
Change the verb form
formulating
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 a wrong idea of a
place
Use synonyms
. It can be a problem for all, the magazine
lose
Change the verb form
loses
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 luxury and confidence, you jeopardize your credibility, my town
get
Change the verb form
gets
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acknowledge
Wrong verb form
acknowledged
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 as a scam
place
Use synonyms
 and we will lose
tourist
Correct article usage
the tourist
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 economy. And
Linking Words
finally
Add a comma
finally,
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 the
traveler
Change the spelling
traveller
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, who
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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 annoyed and frustrated.
To sum up
Linking Words
, change the information, read and search carefully about a
place
Use synonyms
 before writing. As a recommendation, I'm willing to help you and I encourage
to
Correct pronoun usage
you to
show examples
 talk with native people. Thanks, and best wishes. Sebastian Hernandez.

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea to maintain clarity. Your letter mixes several points in single paragraphs. Structuring paragraphs around one main idea will help readers follow your argument more easily.
Coherence & Cohesion
Try to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly. This would include expressions for adding information, contrasting, giving examples, concluding, etc., to improve the flow of your writing.
Task Achievement
To fully satisfy the task requirements, make sure to address all parts of the prompt in enough detail. Your letter could elaborate more on why accurate information is crucial and provide more specific suggestions for how the magazine can rectify the situation.
Task Achievement
Maintain a formal tone throughout the letter for consistency. While your tone is generally appropriate, there are instances where informal expressions are used ('fake data,' 'scam place'). Using consistently formal language would better suit the context of writing to an editor.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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