Some people think that governments should do more to make their citizens eat a healthy diet. Others believe that individuals must take responsibility for their own diet and health. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #governments #citizens #diet #individuals #responsibility #health

People

have different views about whether the authorities should take

further

actions to persuade their individuals to have healthier diets or whether

people

should be in charge of their own

diet

and health.

While

some believe citizens should take responsibility for

this

issue, I consider that

governments

need to conduct more activities. On the one hand, it is generally acknowledged that

people

should be careful about their health and try to have a proper

diet

People

's tastes and attitudes are different from each other,

that is

why every individual should watch out for his own

diet

carefully.

In addition

, it is self-evident that

governments

are not able to control every single individual to have a healthy lifestyle. So it is rational that each person tries to check what is beneficial for his own health and what is not.

For instance

, the ones who suffer from chronic diseases need to have special meals in order not to worsen their sickness.

On the other hand

, it is advisable that

governments

must prepare some adverts about healthy

diet

and try to make it a

people

's culture. The more advertisements are produced about having a healthy food diversity, the more

people

will be aware of unhealthy aspects of their

diet

Moreover

, changing lifestyle is a huge plan which is a long-term program and needs everybody's special attention. Every humble step could be helpful in

this

regard. A point of view is some TV adverts about the fast food drawbacks which encourage

people

to cut down on these kinds of meals. In conclusion,

although

several

people

agree that

people

must be careful about their own

diet

, I am of the opinion that both individuals and

governments

should take additional actions to reduce the amount of unhealthy food in citizens' diets.

Submitted by keyhan454 on Tue Mar 12 2024

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Task Response

To improve Task Response, ensure to fully develop your opinion throughout the essay, not just in the conclusion. Integrate your stance in the discussion of both views more explicitly, providing stronger arguments for why you believe in the necessity of government intervention alongside individual responsibility.

Coherence and Cohesion

To enhance Coherence and Cohesion, aim for smoother transitions between paragraphs and within them. Phrases such as 'On the one hand,' and 'On the other hand,' structure your argument well, but vary your transitional language for a more sophisticated flow. Additionally, cohesive devices could be more varied to link ideas more naturally.

Task Response

To further improve the essay, include more relevant examples to support your points. Specific examples strengthen your arguments by providing concrete evidence. Consider incorporating real-life initiatives by governments to promote healthy diets, or statistics that highlight the impact of government-led health campaigns.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that governments should do more to make their citizens eat a healthy diet. Others believe that individuals must take responsibility for their own diet and health. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Your college has a considerable amount of money to spend on improving your school security. You've been asked to write a report for the director saying whether the money should be spent on more security guards or sophosticated equipment.

Some people say the government should give health care the first priorities, some others believe there are more important priorities to spend the taxpayer's money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many workplaces, online communication is becoming more commonplace than face-to-face meetings. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Vaccinating children against preventing diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous to waht extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+