Music has always been and continues to be the universal language of mankind. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Music
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has been a
crutiall
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crucial
critical
tool in history
on
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for
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culture exchange and international communication, and it will constantly
playing
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play
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its role in time to come.
Therefore
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, I agree with the statement
wholeheartly
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wholeheartedly
.
People
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have been using
music
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to convey messages and
share
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values in various global events for
centries
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centuries
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. As an indispensable representation of art,
music
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carries important messages
in
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on
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different occasions.
For example
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, the hosting country of the Olympic Games has been playing their other local
music
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in the
Openning
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Opening
Ceremony for decades, in order to express their welcome and display their culture to the world.
Additionally
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, well-known artists have been invited to perform for the World Cup to
share
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the core value of collaboration through their
music
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.
Music
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will serve as a bridge connecting individuals together in the future as it does not require specific skills to sense or understand. Conventional
way
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ways
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of
comminucation
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communication
such
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as writing and speaking require a wide range of vocabulary of the according language.
However
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,
people
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are able to
share
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common feelings and emotions from
music
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without barriers of educational level.
Such
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non-verbal connection brings listeners closer.
Furthermore
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, some songs can even unite
people
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even if they are far from each other. National songs,
for example
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, always raise the sense of belonging from the bottom of one's heart
,
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apply
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and
reminds
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remind
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people
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of their homeland.
To conclude
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,
music
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may carry messages on various themes and deliver diverse
culture
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cultures
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to the world, bringing different values and history. It is
also
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easier for
people
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from distinguished backgrounds to
share
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the same information and emotion through
music
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, which brings them closer
with out
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without
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language limitations.
Therefore
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,
music
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will continue to be the universal bond of all mankind.

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task achievement
Ensure all paragraphs are well-developed with specific examples. While you've provided examples like the Olympic Games and World Cup, further details or more varied examples could enrich the essay further.
coherence cohesion
Continue to maintain clear paragraphing with specific topic sentences as you have done. This greatly aids coherence and cohesion.
general
Pay attention to spelling and grammatical accuracy (e.g., 'crucial' instead of 'crutiall', 'centuries' instead of 'centries'). Frequent errors can hinder the reader's understanding and affect your score.
coherence cohesion
To strengthen the introduction and conclusion, ensure the thesis statement in the introduction summarizes the main points, and the conclusion reinforces them without introducing new ideas.
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