Some people believe that children’s time outside of school should be filled with scheduled activities such as art and music classes and sports. Others feel that children need free time to play and relax. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is argued by different groups of the crowds whether or not the scheduled activities either art, sports or music classes ought to be spent by the children during the time outside of school
instead
of having free time to play and relax. From my prospect, I opine that the freedom of the students
to relax is the most vital.
On one hand, due to
the concerning issues occuring
throughout the world among Correct your spelling
occurring
the
adolescents, a fair portion of the folks reckon, Correct article usage
apply
after school
, Add a hyphen
after-school
the
activities should be scheduled in order to be participated by the young folks to make the worthier learning. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, many popular sports clubs among the
teenagers Correct article usage
apply
such
as football, basketball and badminton should be established hence
the students
are able to opt the
various interactions.
Change preposition
for the
On the contrary
, the other group of the
adults believes that the right of the Correct article usage
apply
students
to relax by
whatever wanted is more crucial because of the belief that the clubs provided are not adequate since the young individuals likely desire not to be enforced by the teachers about their affectionate activities. To illustrate, in Japan, Tennis, which is Change preposition
in
the
well-known Correct article usage
a
sports
, is often played by the Japanese, on the flip side, the game is not popular in other countries, Fix the agreement mistake
sport
that is
, the difference of
Change preposition
in
the
nationality affects Correct article usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
liking.
Change noun form
people's
To sum up
, two different thoughts about how educational institution
should allocate the left time are controverted by the adults. In my aspect, I strongly agree with the thought Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
presenting
that the Verb problem
apply
students
need to relax and play according to
their desire
.Fix the agreement mistake
desires
Submitted by nutthan.aud on
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Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
Enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas by making your opinion and reasoning clearer. Include more detailed examples that directly support your point of view.
Coherence & Cohesion
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Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure your introduction and conclusion are clear, concise, and directly related to the topic. Reiterate your main points in the conclusion to strengthen your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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