Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations
Whilst some
people
believe in accepting a difficult condition of life
, others
believe that every person deserves a
hope for a better Remove the article
apply
life
condition. In my opinion. Everyone has a choice
and certain reasons like the
unsatisfactory Correct article usage
an
job
or shortage of money cannot be a serious problem.
On the one hand, the humans are very sociable. Most of them could depend on advice or moral support on a regular basis. But, in fact
it can lead to Add a comma
fact,
indicisiveness
. Frequently, some of these kinds of Correct your spelling
indecisiveness
people
tend to ask for an advice
and can easily go by Remove the article
advice
a piece of advice
a bit of advice
others
opinion. It kills the strive and confidence of individuals. For example
: some parents could instill their values to
their children by enrolling them Change preposition
in
something
they don't like, in some Change preposition
on something
cases
they are forced to have Add a comma
cases,
the
unsatisfactory Correct article usage
an
job
.
Some people
suggest just to accept
Change the verb form
accepting
the
fate.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, others
believe that problems like unsatisfactory job
can be Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
dealed
. It all depends on Verb problem
dealt with
an
ambition of individuals. Correct article usage
the
People
who are forced to have might have
Verb problem
apply
job
changing or if someone has financial hardship could just find additional work.
In my view, everyone has responsibility for their own Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
life
, and everything happening around us is just the result of our choice
. You can just sit and do nothing but it's always the
best to try something.
In conclusion, many Correct article usage
apply
people
believes
that humans should accept the bad Change the verb form
believe
condition
of Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
life
. And others
believe it's always right to have a choice
and try something. In my opinion
trying to do something for a better Add a comma
opinion,
life
is always the right choice
. We just need to move. As Buddha said "nothing
is impossible"Capitalize word
Nothing
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task achievement
To improve task response, ensure your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. It seems you've established a basic response to the prompt, but your essay could benefit from more detailed exploration and discussion of the topic. Provide more depth to your argument by including more reasons, explanations, and specific examples that directly relate to your main points.
coherence cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, work on organizing your ideas more logically and clearly. It's crucial to structure your essay in a way that each paragraph has a clear main idea and your points flow logically from one to the next. This can be aided by using a variety of linking words and phrases to show the relationships between your ideas. Additionally, ensure your introduction and conclusion are strong and clearly relate to each other and the essay body.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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