The government should reduce the amount of money spent on local environmental problems and instead increase funding into urgent and more threatening issues such as global warming. To what extent do you agree

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It is
fact
Correct article usage
a fact
show examples
that global warming is a
threathing
Correct your spelling
threatening
issue
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around the world. But
this
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is not
a
Change the article
the
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best solution for the
authority
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authorities
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should minimise money on local environmental problems
besides
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increasing funds for preventing global warming
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issue
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issues
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. I totally disagree with
this
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statement because these both problems are needed to address it. A
further
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expand
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expansion
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will be provided in
this
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essay. To commence with, local environmental
Issues
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should be addressed by the ruling party
otherwise
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people will suffer numerous health
issues
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.
This
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is because air contamination, water pollution, congestion and toxic
wastages
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wastage
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dumped
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are dumped
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into the river, these problems should be managed by the government, so they should not reduce the amount of protecting
local
Add an article
the local
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environment
Use synonyms
.
For example
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,
accroding
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according
to the survey
said
Verb problem
apply
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that
Correct determiner usage
the
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unhygine
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hygiene
unhygienic
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problems
show examples
problem
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problems
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can lead to
getting
Verb problem
apply
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plenty of diseases
such
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as respiratory
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problems
show examples
problem
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problems
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, lung cancer and stroke.
Hence
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, the
rulling
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ruling
party should allocate
fund
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funds
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for protecting the local
environment
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than
Rephrase
rather than
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allocates
Wrong verb form
allocating
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more money
on
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to
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global warming trouble.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, protecting the regional
environment
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Linking Words
also
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is also
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crucial to stay far away from any
catastrophy
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catastrophe
.
This
Linking Words
is because
alobal
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global
warming can happen by regional restrictions namely forest destruction.
For instance
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, Amazon forest trees have
cut
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been cut
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and destroyed by people,
thus
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, it brings plenty of environmental
issues
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, so
this
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issue
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should be addressed to the world-wide. Needless to say, all countries
liont
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lions
together to protect our planet from global warming in order
to
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that
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the earth will not be damaged by the global warming
issue
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. In conclusion, the government should allocate
Correct article usage
a lows
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lows
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low
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amount for
local
Correct article usage
the local
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environment
Use synonyms
but it should
gives
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give
show examples
more funds for
Correct article usage
the threating
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threating
Correct your spelling
treating
threatening
and urgent trouble of global warming. I totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
statement because both these
issues
Use synonyms
are needed to prevent and money should not
reduce
Wrong verb form
be reduced
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for
local
Add an article
the local
show examples
environment
Use synonyms
and I hope
this
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brings plenty of benefits to society.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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task achievement
Despite the attempt to address the prompt, the essay does not develop a clear position throughout, resulting in a somewhat incomplete response. To improve, clearly state your position in the introduction and consistently support this view throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay shows an effort to organize ideas and arguments. However, there's a lack of clear logical sequencing which affects the coherence of the text. Use clear topic sentences at the start of paragraphs and ensure subsequent sentences support the main idea clearly.
task achievement
While you included examples, they were not always specific or fully developed. To strengthen your arguments, incorporate detailed examples that directly support your main points. This will enhance the persuasiveness and relevance of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urgent issues
  • global warming
  • local environmental problems
  • funding
  • redirecting funds
  • broader environmental health
  • financial efficiency
  • return on investment
  • cost-effective
  • holistic approach
  • moral and ethical considerations
  • resource allocation
  • long-term consequences
  • short-term impacts
  • competing environmental concerns
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