In some countries, people live with their parents and siblings until their old age. Do you think there are more advantages or disadvantages to this behaviour? Discuss your opinion and provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Living with
parents
and siblings until old age is common in some nations. It gives the
parents
comfort as their children still close
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
them,
however
, it could make the children are not flexible. The essay will discuss
further
the benefits and drawbacks of
this
behaviour. Some eastern countries have a culture where kids are supposed to be living with their
parents
until they get
marriage
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married
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.
This
practice is quite common among the Chinese as they value money and family.
While
they maintain the family
relation ship
Correct your spelling
relationship
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, they can
also
save a lot of money if their children still living with them.
For instance
, living
cost
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costs
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can make people
stress
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stressed
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as it can
spend
Verb problem
cost
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more than 50% salary.
In addition
, groceries are
also
getting more expensive today.
Therefore
, these people can save a lot of money if they stay with their families.
On the other hand
, living with siblings and
parents
can make someone
to be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
less
freedom
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free
show examples
and responsible.
For example
, living alone can give us more
decision
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decisions
show examples
to
be made
Wrong verb form
make
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like whether
cook
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to cook
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our own food or
buying
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buy
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in a restaurant.
This
flexibility is hard to get when living with
parents
or siblings
due to
many individuals to decide for a simple decision. In the end, living with family members is hard as we need to think about their needs. In conclusion, people will get more benefits in
term
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terms
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of
economical
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economic
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values and better relationships with their family members if they live with them.
Although
it can give less flexibility, the family members can decide who takes
decision
Add an article
a decision
the decision
show examples
and practice
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
way of living.
Submitted by riki on

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Task Achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction to specify if you believe there are more advantages or disadvantages.
Task Achievement
Use a wider range of vocabulary and complex sentence structures to articulate your ideas more precisely and enhance the sophistication of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure a logical flow of ideas by using transitional phrases effectively between paragraphs and within paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion
Develop your main points more fully with detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Conclude your essay by summarizing the main points discussed and reiterating your stance in a clear and concise manner.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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