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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The given bar chart represents spending for five main fields in the USA, Canada, the UK, and Japan in 2009.

The given bar chart represents spending for five main fields in the USA, Canada, the UK, and Japan in 2009.
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The given bar chart illustrates the
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on 5 various categories in 4 different
nations
Use synonyms
 by 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
 , it can be observed that Housing had
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 total spending from all
nations
Use synonyms
 ,
whereas
Linking Words
 Health care saw the least .
Additionally
Linking Words
 , most of countries s With regards to the
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on Food and Housing where there was an opposite pattern when it comes to
US
Correct article usage
the US
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 and Japan by replacing their position as a country with
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
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 and lowest
expending
Correct your spelling
expenses
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. Taking a look at Canada and
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 Kingdom , they accounted for about 15% and 20%
expending
Correct your spelling
spending
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was 5% less than Housing . Turning to the remaining categories where Transportation had
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
expenditure
Use synonyms
 from all
nations
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
making up over 10% . Focusing on Health care , it saw a minority of spending except for
United
Correct article usage
the United
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states
Capitalize word
States
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 which had more than 5%
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on
this
Linking Words
 category .
Likewise
Linking Words
 , Clothing comprised
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nearly 10%
Use synonyms
expenditure
Change preposition
of expenditure
show examples
 in all
nations
Use synonyms

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Vocabulary: Replace the words expenditure, nations with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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