In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

in certain areas, parents want their

children

to become some of the best people. education is the main way for

children

's future. every child prefers to become something that they want if parents give the right advice. In my view, both sides should discussed in

this

essay. on the one hand, some people believe that confidence is a good way to increase their

children

ability

Fix the agreement mistake

abilities

show examples

. if offspring get a motivated speech on time. it can

also

build child communication

as well as

self-confidence. In their adolescent age, offspring have a tendency to be insecure.

Consequently

, offspring would be afraid of presenting in public.

Hence

, offspring would avoid any particular activities that require confidence,

such

as debating, performing on stage, or speaking in public. on

Correct article usage

the

show examples

other hand, sometimes they can be harmful to some offspring if they want and won't get them.

although

, in a few countries, watching TV and social media have bad effects on offspring. which could

provide

Verb problem

cause

show examples

a lot of problems in their mind.

in addition

, one drawback back is that offspring don't understand what's wrong and right.

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

schools can impose a massive punishment on

children

so that they are afraid of negative consequences.

moreover

, in France, a female student

was fail

Change the verb form

failed

show examples

in her exam and

then

died. and leave a message "How can I look at my father's face".

thus

, a good education leads to good success. in conclusion, parents can show a good way

Change preposition

for

show examples

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

future if they can motivate and support them.

Furthermore

, wrong ideas can be in different directions for

children

. it can

also

decrease

children

's goals.

Submitted by hadvaniparth1 on Sun Mar 17 2024

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structure

Develop a clear introduction and conclusion. The introduction should clearly present your opinion or the main theme of your essay. The conclusion should summarize your main points and reiterate your main argument or perspective.

structure

Enhance the logical structure of your essay by organizing it into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific point or aspect of the topic. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph.

content

Support your main points with specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. This not only aids in maintaining relevance but also in demonstrating a deeper understanding of the topic.

language

Improve grammatical accuracy and range. Use a variety of sentence structures and pay attention to grammar and spelling. Seek to enhance your vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely.

language

Pay attention to the coherence of your essay. Use linking words to connect ideas within and across paragraphs. This will aid in improving the flow and readability of your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

achieve
try hard
positive mindset
self-belief
motivates
ambitious goals
resilience
determination
confidence
self-esteem
growth mindset
unrealistic expectations
disappointment
failure
effort
hard work
seek support
individual differences
abilities
capabilities

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In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?

some people say that history is not important. some say it is. describe both views.

Some people say History is one of most important school subjects other people think that, in today world,subject like science and technology are more important than History.

12.More and more people are using computers and electric devices to access information, therefore there is no need to print books, magazines and newspapers on paper. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Write an essay with no less than 250 words.

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook)have had a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?