IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

propaganda poster of isis Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of the phenomenon.

#propaganda #poster #isis #phenomenon
This
poster
, in my opinion, was considerate enough to influent both two groups of audiences that
ISIS
 aims at.
Firstly
, speaking of the audience who is ardent to join
ISIS
this
poster
 is truly attractive.
This
poster
 occasions reflection upon the bravery of fighters of the Islamic
state
Capitalize word
State
show examples
 of Iraq and Syria (
ISIS
)
violated
Correct pronoun usage
who violated
show examples
 the US, the most powerful country in the world, by putting a bomb on the US. The next
audiences
Fix the agreement mistake
audience
show examples
 who wanted to be
considering
Change the form of the verb
considered
show examples
 in
this
concerne
Correct your spelling
concern
 is the
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
 nation;
this
poster
 is reckoned to be un of the most dangerous literature that
ISIS
 has created so far
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because it could terrify the civilians of the
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
 country.
Additionally
Add a comma
Additionally,
show examples
 it is not just
this
poster
, in which
ISIS
 has created many more of
this
 movie and photos.
This
 content could terrify citizens of
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
possiblity
Correct your spelling
possibility
 of happening another disaster similar to 9/11. Aside from that,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most of the propaganda materials that
ISIS
 creates typically involve the use of violence in order to
instill
Change the spelling
instil
show examples
 fear in their adversary, but
this
 billboard does not do so.
This
 is a very brilliant method, in my opinion, because
this
 billboard may spread to a wider audience without being censored.
For instance
, we can find
this
poster
 on social media, on Google, and even in the news.
This
 is evidence that the strategy that
ISIS
 employs is having a great deal of success. In spite of the fact that
this
 picture did not have any violent elements,
this
poster
 has the potential to effectively spread terror among the people in the United States of America,
as well as
 among the people in
western
Capitalize word
Western
show examples
 countries.
Submitted by dzackyhabibi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structuring
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. State your main argument or topic sentence early to guide the reader.
Paragraphing
Organize your main points logically. Begin each paragraph with a clear topic sentence, followed by explanations, examples, and a concluding sentence.
Supporting Ideas
Support your main points with more detailed, developed examples or evidence to strengthen your argument.
Task Response
Clearly address the advantages and disadvantages of the phenomenon as asked in the prompt. Make sure your response provides a balanced view or examines both sides of the issue.
Content Relevance
Avoid sensitive or potentially offensive topics that might not be appropriate for the IELTS writing task. Choose examples and subjects that are universally acceptable.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: