It is suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is very important that primary school
children
are necessary for taking
knowledge
of how to grow
vegetables
and keep
animals
as
a pets
Correct the article-noun agreement
pets
a pet
show examples
.In the forthcoming paragraph, I will explain why these learning things
advantages
Add a missing verb
have advantages
show examples
over disadvantages.
To begin
with,Learning ability in primary school
children
is very high because they have on initial growth of mind and physical they are curious for learning something new if
teacher
Add an article
the teacher
a teacher
show examples
is try
Change the verb form
is trying
show examples
to educate
children
about how to grow
vegetables
and keep animal as a pet or for other uses
then
it helps for
children
to come across the reality of
vegetables
Change the noun form
vegetable
show examples
growth and their every aspect like in which type of protein vegetable have and it helps for
children
in future for making a career in the agricultural field and distribute
knowledge
to other people,
on the other hand
keeping
animals
as a pet help
kids
to come out from being an introvert person.It
also
helps
kids
to like and care
someone
Change preposition
for someone
show examples
is very important and it
also
helps them to make relationships strongly and usefully in future.
On the other hand
,If
children
learn how to grow
vegetables
then
they miss the importance of other subjects but if teachers and parents manage their studies
then
it can be helpful for
kids
to grow with
this
knowledge
.If we talk about
animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals
show examples
keeping
animals
is very dangerous for primary school
kids
due to
the fact that
animals
probably injure them with their nails and teeth but it's not true some
animals
are
also
very friendly
nature
Change preposition
in nature
show examples
human
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
and animal
boundation
Correct your spelling
bonding
comes from
a past eras
Correct the article-noun agreement
past eras
a past era
show examples
.So,If
kids
try to gain
knowledge
of animal behaviour or teachers teach them how to keep
animals
safe
then
animals
not harm
children
and anyone else ever.
To sum up
,
Children
gain
knowledge
from extra like how to grow
vegetables
and keep
animals
is very useful for their present and future
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
.It helps them to grow naturally and behaviorally.
Submitted by sanjayrajput2163 on

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task achievement
To improve task response, focus on directly addressing the question prompt. Ensure your response fully covers both advantages and disadvantages, providing clear and balanced viewpoints. Increase specificity by adding more detailed examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance coherence by organizing your essay into clear paragraphs, each addressing a specific point. Transition smoothly between ideas using linking phrases. This will strengthen the logical flow and make your essay easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
To better support your main points, include specific examples and elaborate on them. Examples serve as evidence for your arguments and make your essay more persuasive. Draw from a range of scenarios to illustrate your points effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainable practices
  • cultural literacy
  • hands-on experience
  • nutritional awareness
  • curriculum integration
  • time management
  • resource allocation
  • school gardening projects
  • animal husbandry
  • ecosystem education
  • dietary habits
  • work ethic
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