IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

1.Today, lots of people have their own computer and a telephone, which made it easy for people to do job at their home. Does working at home have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#lots #people #computer #telephone #job #home
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
 era of technology,
people
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 are more likely to have their own
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
 and
telephone
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telephones
show examples
. Especially after COVID-19, many companies allowed their
employees
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 to
work
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 remotely or
work
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 from
home
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. There are more advantages compared to disadvantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 new
work
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 trend.
Initially
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, when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
COVID-19 was new at that time only
people
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 working in
IT
Correct article usage
the IT
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 sector were allowed to
work
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 remotely but now it is a part of
Use synonyms
work
Correct article usage
the work
show examples
 trend. There are many advantages of working from
home
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 like
employees
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 can
work
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 in peace as they don't have to travel to
office
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the office
an office
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. They
work
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 in
friendly
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a friendly
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environment
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 which increases their
overall
Linking Words
 productivity. Companies
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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also
Linking Words
beneficial
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benefit
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 from
this
Linking Words
work
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 schedule as they save electricity and resources because most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
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work
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form
Correct your spelling
from
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home
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. There are many female
employees
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 who have
new born
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newborn
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 babies to take care of and
this
Linking Words
work
Use synonyms
environment
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 plays a major role in balancing those scenarios.
However
Linking Words
, there are many disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
work
Use synonyms
environment
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 like
employees
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 miss that office culture and human connection. Many
people
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 have started gaining weight
due to
Linking Words
 working from
home
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 as they don't have in-office activities to perform. Many
employees
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 complain about their
home
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environment
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 as having children and pets
in
Change preposition
at
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home
Use synonyms
 can affect their
work
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 performance. Interns and new associates are affected the most as they never get an in-person experience of their office which plays a vital role in their job duty. In conclusion, there are many more
and
Correct word choice
apply
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major advantages of working from
home
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 compared to
it's
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its
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 disadvantages. If
people
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work
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 with
correct
Add an article
the correct
show examples
 mindset, I think
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work
Wrong verb form
working
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 from
home
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 is the best
work
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environment
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 to
work
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 in.
Submitted by tirththakkar23 on

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task achievement
To enhance your task response, consider providing more varied and detailed examples for both the advantages and disadvantages of working from home. This will help demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Try to enhance the cohesion of your essay by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all subsequent sentences within that paragraph directly support that main idea.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • telecommuting
  • remote work
  • work-life balance
  • overhead costs
  • productivity
  • isolation
  • communication barriers
  • collaboration tools
  • flexible schedule
  • blurred boundaries
  • commuting expenses
  • mental health impact
  • home office
  • professional attire
  • distractions
What to do next:
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