1.Today, lots of people have their own computer and a telephone, which made it easy for people to do job at their home. Does working at home have more advantages or more disadvantages?

In
this
era of technology,
people
are more likely to have their own
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
and
telephone
Fix the agreement mistake
telephones
show examples
. Especially after COVID-19, many companies allowed their
employees
to
work
remotely or
work
from
home
. There are more advantages compared to disadvantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
new
work
trend.
Initially
, when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
COVID-19 was new at that time only
people
working in
IT
Correct article usage
the IT
show examples
sector were allowed to
work
remotely but now it is a part of
work
Correct article usage
the work
show examples
trend. There are many advantages of working from
home
like
employees
can
work
in peace as they don't have to travel to
office
Add an article
the office
an office
show examples
. They
work
in
friendly
Add an article
a friendly
show examples
environment
which increases their
overall
productivity. Companies
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
beneficial
Replace the word
benefit
show examples
from
this
work
schedule as they save electricity and resources because most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
work
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
home
. There are many female
employees
who have
new born
Correct your spelling
newborn
show examples
babies to take care of and
this
work
environment
plays a major role in balancing those scenarios.
However
, there are many disadvantages of
this
work
environment
like
employees
miss that office culture and human connection. Many
people
have started gaining weight
due to
working from
home
as they don't have in-office activities to perform. Many
employees
complain about their
home
environment
as having children and pets
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
can affect their
work
performance. Interns and new associates are affected the most as they never get an in-person experience of their office which plays a vital role in their job duty. In conclusion, there are many more
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
major advantages of working from
home
compared to
it's
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its
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disadvantages. If
people
work
with
correct
Add an article
the correct
show examples
mindset, I think
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
from
home
is the best
work
environment
to
work
in.
Submitted by tirththakkar23 on

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task achievement
To enhance your task response, consider providing more varied and detailed examples for both the advantages and disadvantages of working from home. This will help demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Try to enhance the cohesion of your essay by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all subsequent sentences within that paragraph directly support that main idea.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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