IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#expenditure #three #categories #age #groups #residents #uk #summaries #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart illustrates the money
spendings
Replace the word
spent
show examples
 on three
consumption
Use synonyms
 categories including food and drinks,
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
 and
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
 and entertainment by various
age
Use synonyms
 categories citizens of the UK in 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest food and drink
consumption
Use synonyms
 is allocated
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the two groups of people who are over 61 years old. The budget expenditure on
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
 and
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
 is allocated for the other three groups nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
. A more detailed look at the graph shows that the
age
Use synonyms
 group 61-75 spend the most money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 entertainment activities which is
exectly
Correct your spelling
exactly
 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of total
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
show examples
,
conversely
Linking Words
, they spend the least budget
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
 and
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
 at just only 2
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of their total budget.
This
Linking Words
 spending is over ten times less than
Use synonyms
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
show examples
 of people who are under 30. The middle
age
Use synonyms
 group of people (31-45)'s
spendinds
Correct your spelling
spending
spendings
 on three
consumption
Use synonyms
 categories are nearly
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 between around 8-13
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food and drink,
under
Correct pronoun usage
those under
show examples
 30 residents allocate for it 14
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of total
spendinds
Correct your spelling
spending
spendings
 which is the highest percentage compared to other
age
Use synonyms
 groups.
Submitted by zulzayanyamkhu on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, age, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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