Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to change our character traits. To what extent do you agree?
There is an ongoing debate regarding
character
traits
. A lot of individuals believe that everyones
behaviour and Change to a genitive case
everyone's
personalities
are all determined in advance Fix the agreement mistake
personality
due to
the distinct genes from their ancestors even before a person
is born . Further
, it is impossible to change or modify a peron
' s Correct your spelling
person
character
traits
. I oppose this
viewpoint highly and my position is further
elaborated in the upcoming paragraphs to prove my disagreeable opinion to a large extent.
Discussing the first and foremost point , many individuals think that a good looking
and beautiful Add a hyphen
good-looking
face
is a distinct character
traits
. But , Change the noun form
trait
due to
advancing technology
it is possible to make not Add a comma
technology,
good
Correct your spelling
not-good-looking
looking
Verb problem
apply
face
into a beautiful one. To elaborate , due to
coming
of plastic surgery the Correct article usage
the coming
face
of any person
can be alter
. It is a new invention in Change the verb form
be altered
Correct article usage
the doctor
doctor
field which can help to change their Change noun form
doctor's
face
from average or ugly to very attractive.
Furthermore
, there is also
a
orthodox idea in Change the article
an
public
mind that if a Add an article
the public
children's
parents have Fix the agreement mistake
child's
build
up Wrong verb form
built
body
Correct pronoun usage
their body
due to
some training or practising at gym
, Add an article
the gym
then
their children will also
develop it without doing any kind of Exercise or training. But , it is not true , as for a good build up body
exercise is necessary. Even a skinny or fat body
can develop their body
by doing every day
training . Replace the word
everyday
Hence
, in this
way person
's character
traits
can be changed by doing exercise daily
Following these , numerous folks think that if a child's father or mother is an expert in some kind of profession , then
they will also
become master
in Fix the agreement mistake
masters
the
Correct article usage
apply
smiliar
work. Correct your spelling
similar
However
. It can either be possible or impossible as the child of uneducated
Correct article usage
an uneducated
person's
can Change the noun form
people
person
also
become a high ranker in schools or colleges. To show an example, according to
a survey in India in 2023 75% of children who graduated from higher secondary schools belongs
to uneducated parents.
Correct subject-verb agreement
belong
To sum up
, I oppose this
view to a large extent. Because, character
traits
are not decided from our birth as well as
can be changed or modified due to
hard work , modern technology and determination. Therefore
, I highly oppose this
statement.Submitted by akshayashvi07 on
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Task Achievement
To improve Task Achievement, ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt. Focus on providing clear and direct answers to the question, supported by relevant examples that specifically relate to personality traits and genes, rather than physical appearance or abilities acquired through practice.
Coherence and Cohesion
Structuring your essay with clear, distinct paragraphs for each main idea can enhance Coherence and Cohesion. Begin each paragraph with a topic sentence that introduces the idea you will discuss. This will help in making your essay more cohesive and easier for readers to follow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance Coherence by linking ideas between paragraphs using transitional phrases. Also, ensure that examples you provide directly support your main arguments. This will make your essay more cohesive and strengthen the support for your main points.
Task Achievement
Your essay should consistently focus on the role genes play in determining personality traits and to what extent they can be altered. Avoid diverting to topics that are not directly relevant to the essay prompt, such as physical changes through surgery or achievements unrelated to inherited traits.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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