Our personalities are predetermined as a result of our genes before we are born and there is nothing that can be done to change our character traits. To what extent do you agree?

There is an ongoing debate regarding
character
traits
. A lot of individuals believe that
everyones
Change to a genitive case
everyone's
show examples
behaviour and
personalities
Fix the agreement mistake
personality
show examples
are all determined in advance
due to
the distinct genes from their ancestors even before a
person
is born .
Further
, it is impossible to change or modify a
peron
Correct your spelling
person
' s
character
traits
. I oppose
this
viewpoint highly and my position is
further
elaborated in the upcoming paragraphs to prove my disagreeable opinion to a large extent. Discussing the first and foremost point , many individuals think that a
good looking
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good-looking
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and beautiful
face
is a distinct
character
traits
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trait
show examples
. But ,
due to
advancing
technology
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technology,
show examples
it is possible to make not
good
Correct your spelling
not-good-looking
show examples
looking
Verb problem
apply
show examples
face
into a beautiful one. To elaborate ,
due to
coming
Correct article usage
the coming
show examples
of plastic surgery the
face
of any
person
can
be alter
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be altered
show examples
. It is a new invention in
Correct article usage
the doctor
show examples
doctor
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doctor's
show examples
field which can help to change their
face
from average or ugly to very attractive.
Furthermore
, there is
also
a
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an
show examples
orthodox idea in
public
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the public
show examples
mind that if a
children's
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child's
show examples
parents have
build
Wrong verb form
built
show examples
up
body
Correct pronoun usage
their body
show examples
due to
some training or practising at
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
,
then
their children will
also
develop it without doing any kind of Exercise or training. But , it is not true , as for a good build up
body
exercise is necessary. Even a skinny or fat
body
can develop their
body
by doing
every day
Replace the word
everyday
show examples
training .
Hence
, in
this
way
person
's
character
traits
can be changed by doing exercise daily Following these , numerous folks think that if a child's father or mother is an expert in some kind of profession ,
then
they will
also
become
master
Fix the agreement mistake
masters
show examples
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
smiliar
Correct your spelling
similar
work.
However
. It can either be possible or impossible as the child of
uneducated
Correct article usage
an uneducated
show examples
person's
Change the noun form
people
person
show examples
can
also
become a high ranker in schools or colleges. To show an example,
according to
a survey in India in 2023 75% of children who graduated from higher secondary schools
belongs
Correct subject-verb agreement
belong
show examples
to uneducated parents.
To sum up
, I oppose
this
view to a large extent. Because,
character
traits
are not decided from our birth
as well as
can be changed or modified
due to
hard work , modern technology and determination.
Therefore
, I highly oppose
this
statement.
Submitted by akshayashvi07 on

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Task Achievement
To improve Task Achievement, ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt. Focus on providing clear and direct answers to the question, supported by relevant examples that specifically relate to personality traits and genes, rather than physical appearance or abilities acquired through practice.
Coherence and Cohesion
Structuring your essay with clear, distinct paragraphs for each main idea can enhance Coherence and Cohesion. Begin each paragraph with a topic sentence that introduces the idea you will discuss. This will help in making your essay more cohesive and easier for readers to follow.
Coherence and Cohesion
Enhance Coherence by linking ideas between paragraphs using transitional phrases. Also, ensure that examples you provide directly support your main arguments. This will make your essay more cohesive and strengthen the support for your main points.
Task Achievement
Your essay should consistently focus on the role genes play in determining personality traits and to what extent they can be altered. Avoid diverting to topics that are not directly relevant to the essay prompt, such as physical changes through surgery or achievements unrelated to inherited traits.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • predetermined
  • character traits
  • genetic influence
  • environmental factors
  • personality development
  • upbringing
  • foundation
  • evolution of traits
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