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Band 5.5

All chirldren should study a foreign language in school, starting in the earliest grades. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#chirldren #study #language #school #grades
In
this
 day and
age
, a plethora of people believe that it should be mandatory for young generations to learn a foreign language as much as possible at an early
age
 in school.I completely agree with
this
 point and give my triggers below.
In addition
, I shall give my personal opinion on
this
 view.
To begin
 with, there are several reasons for
this
 statement.
This
 belief can have a positive effect on youngsters because the children's brains who are 6 or 5 years old are processed well.
In other words
, they can learn things faster compared to adults. Researchers say that a child can develop rapidly from birth to
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 of 6.
Moreover
, their communication skills will dramatically increase if they speak in new language.
For instance
,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 toddler who is able to speak another language can play and talk with foreigners without any struggles and will face few difficulties in looking for jobs abroad in the future.
On the other hand
, there are plenty of causes that humans disagree with
this
 concept. Studying a foreign tongue in the earliest grades can be sophisticated for the young nation. There are other things and activities and studying a foreign tongue will tire them.
Instead
 of that, they ought to learn good manners, responsibility and discipline in school. Because teaching it at
such
 a young
age
 might cause their brain to strain hard and might not be able to function really well. Teaching them step-by-step in school will help them to function well in embracing pieces of information.
To sum up
, I totally see eye to eye with the first idea. Learning foreign languages should be obligatory for youth because it is extremely beneficial for them in terms of future career opportunities and mental development.
Submitted by Shaxnoza on

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task achievement
The essay presents a clear position throughout the response, with an opening statement that declares total agreement with the prompt. However, to enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas, consider further elaborating on each point made by providing more in-depth explanations or additional examples. Doing so will strengthen your argument and help the reader understand your perspective more fully.
coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates an attempt at logical organization, but the flow of ideas can be improved. To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider variety of linking words and transitional phrases to smoothly guide the reader from one idea to the next. Also, strive for a clearer, more pronounced separation between paragraphs, ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, supported by relevant explanations or examples.
coherence cohesion
It's essential to accurately transmit arguments and explanations. Be cautious with grammar and vocabulary to prevent misunderstandings. Spellcheck and review your essay for phrases or sentences that could be made more precise or formal, as this will improve the overall quality of your writing.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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