Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ?

Nowadays, many
people
in over the
world
spend a
lot
of time using social
media
to keep in touch with other
people
and
got
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
news events. In
this
writer will talk about
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
outweigh
Correct pronoun usage
that outweigh
show examples
the disadvantages.
Firstly
, using social
media
will have many
benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
show examples
like
make
Verb problem
gaining
show examples
a
lot
of knowledge of
information
Add an article
the information
show examples
in over the
world
can
understand
Replace the word
understanding
show examples
and
catch
Wrong verb form
catching
show examples
up
a
Change preposition
on a
show examples
lot
of trends or events in the
world
.
For example
,
chairman
Add an article
the chairman
show examples
can persuade all staff and control
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
social
media
or he can talk to them
some
Change preposition
about some
show examples
of
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
events of his company.
Furthermore
, now have a
lot
of financial
benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
show examples
so most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
use it for shopping online or
find
Fix the infinitive
to find
show examples
some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
work with
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
salary
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
other websites.
Secondly
, for
education
Add a comma
education,
show examples
students can use social
media
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
study online at home, do not go out if they can not or they must at home.
Moreover
, some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
can use that for chatting with
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
or
relax
Wrong verb form
relaxing
show examples
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
some
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
games
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the internet.
For example
,
Add an article
the student
a student
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
must study online when
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
show examples
appear
Correct subject-verb agreement
appears
show examples
in over the
world
or
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
relax, after 1 week to study hard,
at
Correct word choice
and at
show examples
weekend
Correct article usage
the weekend
show examples
students can play more games. With a
lot
of advantages will appear disadvantages like
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some of
Add an article
the website
show examples
website
Fix the agreement mistake
websites
show examples
can have false
information
which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
effected for children and will
be make
Change the verb form
make
show examples
them
to
Correct your spelling
do
show examples
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
show examples
action
Fix the agreement mistake
actions
show examples
but will have different solutions
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
help them like
choose
Wrong verb form
choosing
show examples
true
information
with
resort like
Add a hyphen
resort-like
show examples
famous
Add an article
a famous
show examples
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
to read. In conclusion, using social
media
will have more advantages for
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
or education but will appear disadvantages which
people
do not want so must choose true
information
before
read
Replace the word
reading
show examples
in website.

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structure
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development
Work on developing your ideas more thoroughly. While you provided examples, expanding on how these examples support your main points would strengthen your essay.
grammar
Check your essay for grammatical errors and work on using a range of sentence structures to make your writing more engaging.
vocabulary
Be mindful of repetition. Try to vary your vocabulary to avoid using the same words or phrases multiple times.
task response
Ensure you fully address the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of social media evenly before stating if one outweighs the other.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • facilitate
  • geographically separated
  • fostering
  • connectivity
  • instant communication
  • real-time information
  • misinformation
  • rigorous checks and balances
  • fake news
  • addictive nature
  • detract
  • face-to-face interactions
  • mental health
  • awareness of limitations
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