Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause and what measures can be done to address those problems?

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Currently, there is a rise in the distance between the wealthy and needy

people

Use synonyms

. The root causes of

this

Linking Words

Change the verb form

are

show examples

due to

Linking Words

the differences

Change preposition

show examples

not only opportunities but

also

Linking Words

lifestyles

Use synonyms

, yet it can be tackled by

government

Add an article

the government

a government

show examples

who provide social welfare for the poor. To commence with, one of the reasons for

this

Linking Words

is the diversity of chances in career.

In other words

Linking Words

, the rich

also

Linking Words

have their available social relationships, property and knowledge which promote them to higher positions in their occupations. Meanwhile, disadvantaged individuals do not have any chance to overcome their

porverty

Correct your spelling

poverty

property

or become

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

affluent.

For example

Linking Words

, 95% of

imporved

Correct your spelling

improved

imported

white-collar workers in the UK could not move to the positions of managers because they did not have enough relationships in the firms.

In addition

Linking Words

, another principal cause is the distinction in

lifestyles

Use synonyms

between the rich and the poor. To be more specific, poor

peopple

Correct your spelling

people

tend to pursue extravagant

lifestyles

Use synonyms

and waste their money on negative purposes

such

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as using drugs and gambling or betting.

In contrast

Linking Words

properous

Correct your spelling

prosperous

people

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just follow frugal lives

as well as

Linking Words

invest their money

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show examples

several projects or ventures that can make a profit for them.

As a consequence

Linking Words

, the poor easily go bankrupt ,

while

Linking Words

the rich

also

Linking Words

become wealthier.

For instance

Linking Words

, in 2021, The New York Times showed that the top 10

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

billionaires in the USA just paid 2$ for each breakfast,

whereas

Linking Words

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

citizens who lived in slums always spent 50$. A solution,

however

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, can be found in

government's

Correct article usage

the government's

show examples

actions towards the poor. The most effective approach is for

people

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who are deprived can receive social amenities like accommodations, food and drinks from local authorities.

As a result

Linking Words

, these things will enhance the quality of their lives, leading to

bridge

Change the verb form

bridging

show examples

the gap between the rich and the poor. Take Vietnam as an example here where 50 charity events

happening

Wrong verb form

happen

show examples

every

years

Change to a singular noun

year

show examples

to supply necessary facilities for deprived

people

Use synonyms

and they

also

Linking Words

assisted more than 20000 citizens

relocate

Add the particle

to relocate

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

adequate houses.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the increase

Change preposition

show examples

the gap between affluent and poor individuals stems from inequality of

work's

Change noun form

work

show examples

opportunities

along with

Linking Words

diverse

lifestyles

Use synonyms

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, supplying vital things for the needy will improve

this

Linking Words

problem.

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grammar

There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrases. For example, 'due to the differences of not only opportunities but also lifestyles' could be rephrased for clarity. Also, phrases like 'promote them to higher positions' could be clearer.

writing style

Try to vary your sentence structures to enhance readability. Many sentences start with similar phrases; incorporating different sentence types can make your essay more engaging.

development

Ensure that all points are fully developed. For example, the point about lifestyles leading to poverty could use more explanation about why these behaviors are more prevalent among poorer individuals.

task response

You have successfully identified and explained two major causes of the widening gap between the rich and the poor.

relevant examples

You provided specific examples to support your points, such as the statistics from the UK and the USA, which help to illustrate your arguments effectively.

structure

Your essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy to follow your line of reasoning.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

18
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

367 words

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Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause and what measures can be done to address those problems?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays more tasks at home and work are being performed by robots. Is this a negative or positive development?

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?

Nowadays, learning have gained in popularity but some people argue that courses can never be as good as those taken by attending a college or university in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

To learn effectively, children need to eat a healthy meal at school. How true is this statement? Whose responsibility is it to provide food for school children?

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not have to pay tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree?