IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people around the world use social mdeia every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events . Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #world #mdeia #touch #news #events
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Social
media
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 have been used to keep in touch with other
people
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 around the
world
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 by many individuals. In my personal view, the positive aspects that using social
media
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 provides for
humans
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 is more outweigh the pessimistic aspects . In the modern
day
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, technology develops fast and established
beside
Correct word choice
apply
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humans
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 use social
media
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 to get in touch and spread their relationship network. Social
media
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 helps
humans
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 to update their knowledge
day
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 by
day
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.
Due to
Linking Words
, the
world
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event
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events
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 occurring every
day
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 they need to provide more information around the
world
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.
Another positive aspects
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Another positive aspect
Other positive aspects
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, the speed of searching for information on social
media
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 is dramatically high and fast. It just needs a few minutes to know the news. It may help a busy person to get more easily in their life. What's more convenient and helpful, social
media
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 helps
people
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 to contact other
people
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 quickly.
Therefore
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 they can use social
media
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 to update their status every
day
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 or every minute so their friends and family can know what are they doing and are supposed to do.
Besides
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 that, using social
media
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 can help
humans
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 to save their relationships in the past or the future.
For instance
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, when
people
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 lose contact with other
people
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 they don’t spend too much time increasing relationships.
Due to
Linking Words
 the technology era, meeting up face to face is hard so
people
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 can lose their relationships.
To conclude
Linking Words
, social
media
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 brings a number of benefits to
humans
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 around the
world
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. Social
media
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 has big and important impacts on human lives.

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task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines your stance and the main points you will discuss. Use a thesis statement for clarity.
task achievement
Develop your arguments with more detailed examples and explanations. Providing specific instances or data can enhance the strength of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on paragraph structure to enhance logical flow. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence followed by explanations and examples.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of phrases and words to improve readability and the sophistication of your essay. Use synonyms and varied vocabulary.
coherence cohesion
Revise grammar and sentence structures for clarity. The use of complex and compound sentences can demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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