In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts subjects (e.g. literature) and boys tend to choose science subjects (e.g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this trend need to be changed?

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Gender
disparity in subject choices, where
girls
often opt for arts
subjects
like literature
while
boys lean towards science
subjects
such
as physics, is a persistent trend in many schools and universities.
This
phenomenon stems from societal expectations and stereotypes surrounding
gender
roles. Boys are typically encouraged to pursue STEM fields seen as intellectually rigorous,
while
girls
are nudged towards nurturing and creative disciplines, perpetuating a divide in subject preferences from a young age. Cultural perceptions of
gender
and academic abilities
further
entrench
this
trend. Deep-seated beliefs about
gender
suitability in certain
subjects
contribute to boys feeling pressured to excel in STEM,
while
girls
may face subtle discouragement in pursuing science
subjects
due to
perceived limitations. These biases, both overt and covert, shape
students
' perceptions of their own abilities and influence their academic choices. Institutional factors within educational systems
also
play a role. Biases in teaching methods, curriculum design, and classroom dynamics may inadvertently
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
one
gender
over the other, creating environments that are more conducive to the success of certain
students
.
Lack
Correct article usage
The lack
show examples
of representation of female role models in STEM fields
further
exacerbates feelings of exclusion among
girls
, dissuading them from pursuing these
subjects
. Efforts to address
this
trend must be multifaceted. Initiatives
such
as
gender
-neutral career guidance, mentorship programs, and interventions to promote
girls
' participation in STEM are crucial in dismantling barriers and empowering
students
to make choices based on their interests and aptitudes rather than societal expectations. By fostering environments that encourage all
students
to explore their passions regardless of
gender
, we can create a more inclusive and equitable educational landscape that benefits society as a whole.
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Task Achievement
Your essay distinctly addresses the topic, but your discussion on why the trend should change is not as well-developed as the analysis of the causes. Consider balancing both parts of the question to provide a more comprehensive answer.
Coherence & Cohesion
You've managed to structure your essay logically, but the flow can be improved by enhancing the connections between paragraphs. Try using a wider range of cohesive devices (linking words) to guide the reader through your arguments more seamlessly.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are present and serve their basic purposes. To score higher, ensure these sections are not only indicative of the essay's direction but also engaging and reflective of your critical analysis throughout.
Supporting Main Points
Your essay includes support for your points, but examples are general rather than specific. Incorporating more detailed, unique examples can greatly strengthen your arguments and make for a more persuasive essay.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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