Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets should have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods, while others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There are controversial perspectives heating a debate over
commodities
Change the noun form
commodity
show examples
packaging.
While
some claim
that is
indispensable for producers and
supermarkets
to take liability for mitigating the amount of
goods
packaging, the other makes a statement that it is vital for buyers to avoid purchasing
commodity
Fix the agreement mistake
commodities
show examples
with a myriad of packaging. Each opinion has its own perks, I would contend that it is ideal to combine both mentioned factors. Without a shadow of a doubt, manufacturers and
supermarkets
play a
significance
Replace the word
significant
show examples
role in alleviating
packages
of
goods
.
This
is owing to the fact that by doing so the environment can be prevented from pollution. To be more specific, factories can manufacture their
commodities
with greener materials
such
as
using
Verb problem
apply
show examples
paper bags which can be reusable for abundant times.
Moreover
,
supermarkets
can reduce
this
situation by giving extra
voucher
Fix the agreement mistake
vouchers
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
any customers who do not utilize the original
packages
but bring their own bags.
Therefore
, it is crucial for producers and
supermarkets
to mitigate the quantity of packaging of their
goods
.
While
the role of reducing
packages
of
commodities
by manufacturers and
supermarkets
is widely acknowledged, it is dispensable for shoppers to refuse
spending
Change the verb form
to spend
show examples
money on
goods
with lots of packaging.
This
is probably because their activity can contribute to
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
conservation. Specifically, customers can make use of recycle
packages
such
as tote bags to carry out their products whenever they go out
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
shopping.
Therefore
, buyers should put
premium
Add an article
a premium
show examples
on avoiding purchasing
commodities
with a huge of packaging. In conclusion, manufacturers and
supermarkets
need to
accountable
Add a missing verb
be accountable
show examples
for alleviating the quality of
commodities
packages
.
Moreover
, it is crucial for customers to prevent utilizing
goods
with a wealth of packaging.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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Develop your main points more fully by including more specific examples and evidence. This helps to strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Work on creating a more logical flow between your ideas. Use transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your essay and clearly show how your ideas are connected.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your position. This reinforces your argument and provides a strong finish to your essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sustainability
  • Eco-friendly
  • Carbon footprint
  • Excessive packaging
  • Biodegradable materials
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Consumer advocacy
  • Environmental stewardship
  • Waste reduction
  • Recycling initiatives
  • Green practices
  • Minimalist lifestyle
  • Resource conservation
  • Sustainable consumption
  • Packaging alternatives
  • Regulatory measures
  • Ethical choices
  • Environmental impact assessment
  • Renewable resources
  • Compostable packaging
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