IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Topic: Is it better to live in an urban or rural area. WHat is your opinion?

#topic #area
Urban areas
such
 as Cities and Towns are more convenient to live in. The availability of services is wide, services including hospitals, transportation etcetera. In rural areas
such
 services are there except that not to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
full capacity,
for instance
 getting to the hospital or work, one should require a car because transport is not always around the clock. In
Cities
Add a comma
Cities,
show examples
 there is acquisition of better technology advancement. One of the perks of living in Towns is
high
Correct article usage
the high
show examples
 population, one gets to interact and hang out with different types of people,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 means that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it never gets lonely. Evaluate the above on the basis of IELTS General Writing Task 2 and tell me the weaknesses and
startegy
Correct your spelling
strategy
. As I myself
being
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 born and
growing
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
 up in the City, I prefer it to rural areas. It does not say there are no quiet and dense parts of Cities, of
course
Add a comma
course,
show examples
 there are if someone feels the need for calm.
Submitted by roshnijuneja19182 on

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structure
You've made a fair attempt at defining why urban areas could be considered better to live in than rural areas, with aspects concerning convenience, technology, and social opportunities. To strengthen your essay, start by including a clear introduction that outlines your stance and briefly mentions the points you will discuss. This sets a solid foundation for your essay. Additionally, incorporate a conclusion that summarizes your viewpoints, reinforcing your opinion and providing a strong end to your essay.
content
Your essay demonstrates an understanding of the topic, but could further benefit from specific examples to support each of your points. For instance, mention a technology that's accessible in urban but not in rural areas, or describe a personal experience or a well-known fact that illustrates the social opportunities in cities. This will make your arguments more convincing and relatable.
language
To enhance coherence and cohesion in your writing, vary your sentence structures and use a range of linking words. While you've logically arranged your ideas, improving the flow between sentences and paragraphs will make your essay more readable. Consider phrases such as 'Furthermore,' 'In addition,' or 'On the other hand' to smoothly transition between your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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