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Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays, learners` focus to the lesson in the classrooms has decreased. On my standpoint, both some types of online games on phones and friends who are studying with them are interrupting, and there may be some key solutions which are affective to delay these problems.

#learners` #focus #lesson #classrooms #standpoint #games #phones #friends #affective #delay
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Nowadays, learners` focus
to
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on
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 the lesson in the classrooms has decreased.
On
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From
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 my standpoint, both some types of online games on
phones
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 and friends who are studying with them are interrupting, and there may be some key solutions which are
affective
Correct your spelling
effective
show examples
to delay
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in delaying
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 these problems. On the
one
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 hand, there are some reasons to increase the number of
people
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 who
are
Verb problem
do
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 not
understanding
Wrong verb form
understand
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 lessons in the schools.
To begin
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 with
such
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 reasons, I believe that all
people
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 have their private
phones
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 to utilize or communicate with their parents or friends, but nowadays, many
people
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 tend to play games on their
phones
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.
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Also
Add a comma
Also,
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 many
people
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 are in a lesson, they always try to play games.
In addition
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, some
people
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 think that lessons in their schools are very boring, and they always try to make lessons very interesting with classmates in their classes.
On the other hand
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,
in
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from
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 my perspective, there are some possible solutions
for
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to
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this
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 problem.
Firstly
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, nowadays, in some schools, teachers are trying to
be banned
Wrong verb form
ban
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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phones
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 in classes.
Secondly
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, teachers should set
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one-place
Correct article usage
a one-place
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 system for all
people
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 in which system
one
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 table should
been
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be
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 allocated
for
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apply
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per student. In
this
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 strict system, there is
not
Correct your spelling
no
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 density from
one
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 student to another
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
one
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, there are a lot of issues, but they will be solved effectively by the government with some possible solutions.
Submitted by Azizbek on

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Task Achievement
For Task Achievement: Aim to directly address the question by providing more specific examples and explanations. Make sure your essay clearly answers all parts of the prompt in a comprehensive manner.
Coherence and Cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion: Focus on improving the logical flow of your paragraphs. Use a variety of linking phrases to better connect ideas and paragraphs. Consider paragraphing more clearly to differentiate your main points.
General
For coherence, ensure your introduction and conclusion are clearly defined. Introduce the topic thoroughly and conclude with a summary of your main points and reasons. Provide a clearer stance throughout your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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