Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Your current response is missing a clear structure and does not address both views or provide a personal opinion as the task asks.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as firstly, however, in addition) to structure your ideas more clearly and improve the flow of your essay.
development
Develop your ideas more fully. Discuss both viewpoints on the use of technology in education versus traditional methods in schools, and support these ideas with specific examples or reasons.
accuracy
Check your spelling and grammar carefully. There are several errors that could confuse the reader or make your argument less clear.
completeness
Expand on your ideas and provide a more thorough analysis in order to more fully answer the question. A short response cannot fully cover the requirements of the task.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
The average number of years a person can expect to live has fluctuated across the globe in recent years. Many industrialized nations, though, are experiencing an increase in life expectancy at a substantial rate. This essay will discuss some of the negative consequences associated with this trend and how societies can contribute to diminishing its effects.
There is no one on this planet who does not like to get a raise but the question is at what price? In my opinion, a hefty salary is always something we should aspire for but after a certain amount of money, it’s the satisfaction while doing a job that will keep you motivated and take you places in the long run, therefore I do not agree with the statement. In this essay, we will discuss arguments favouring both sides.
There has been a constant debate about whether the family has the biggest impact on children's growth, or whether elements surrounding them have the most powerful influence. In this essay, I will discuss both opinions and give my opinion on this.
In this day and age, a number of people believe that even when they are older, they can carry out work if it is available. From my perspective, I totally agree that elderly people can continue working if they have the ability.
Universities work as an excellent source of providing a wide range of knowledge in different majors, helping to prepare graduates for their upcoming profession. Some people are advocates of the perspective that faculties ought to come up with a curriculum that covers both the knowledge and skills required in real-world settings. However, others believe that universities would work effectively if only accessibility of information in many subjects is granted. I agree with the last statement almost entirely, and this essay will provide reasons.