Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Your current response is missing a clear structure and does not address both views or provide a personal opinion as the task asks.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as firstly, however, in addition) to structure your ideas more clearly and improve the flow of your essay.
development
Develop your ideas more fully. Discuss both viewpoints on the use of technology in education versus traditional methods in schools, and support these ideas with specific examples or reasons.
accuracy
Check your spelling and grammar carefully. There are several errors that could confuse the reader or make your argument less clear.
completeness
Expand on your ideas and provide a more thorough analysis in order to more fully answer the question. A short response cannot fully cover the requirements of the task.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
Currently, due to the significant development of technology, more and more people are using social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok as places to socialize and entertain with people all around the world. However, some individuals have admired media and sports stars although some of them do not have good behaviors and attitudes. In this essay, I will discuss both advantages and disadvantages and also present my perspective.
In recent years, there is an ongoing debate about whether the fact that young people of all ages ought to have more accountabilities such as helping at home or at work, or whether children should be free to enjoy their lives without extra responsibilities outside of school. While the latter is valid to some extent, I would regard myself as an advocate of the former.
One of the social concerns today relates to children’s education. While it is widely believed that parents should supervise their kid’s activities, others believe that youngsters should have a more free life. I am going to discuss these opposing points of view .In my opinion, mom and dad should not monitor their son and daughter too closely and give them a little bit of freedom.
The vanishing of traditional and cultural customs is a salient issue in modern world society. In this essay, I will discuss these matters and suggest ways in which families and educational systems can mitigate these changes to preserve culture.
It is thought by some that schools are the best place for kids to be taught and develop themselves, while others believe that the right place for this is at home. I will discuss the benefits of both cases and argue why I believe it is essential for kids to attend school.