Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Your current response is missing a clear structure and does not address both views or provide a personal opinion as the task asks.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as firstly, however, in addition) to structure your ideas more clearly and improve the flow of your essay.
development
Develop your ideas more fully. Discuss both viewpoints on the use of technology in education versus traditional methods in schools, and support these ideas with specific examples or reasons.
accuracy
Check your spelling and grammar carefully. There are several errors that could confuse the reader or make your argument less clear.
completeness
Expand on your ideas and provide a more thorough analysis in order to more fully answer the question. A short response cannot fully cover the requirements of the task.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are often perceived as supplementary to core academic subjects. However, I firmly believe that they are equally crucial to a child’s holistic development and should be made compulsory in high schools.
It is considered that parents have a responsibility to teach their offspring how to reproduce the waste. Why is the family responsible for this? Many people argue that school authorities should shoulder this obligation. There are arguments on both sides ,,however which we will discuss here.
There is an ongoing debate among university students regarding choosing courses. Some are interested in learning non-linear supplementary subjects, while others believe it is wiser to maximize their efforts in linear courses to surpass job qualifications. This essay agrees that learning multiple disciplines can benefit students as it provides many career opportunities in the long run.
In modern times, an immense number of workers work from home, connecting their computers or other devices to the internet. As such, working traditions have changed with a new trend while others believe that it only satisfies the employee rather than the employer. In my opinion, I completely disagree with this statement, and in this essay, I will discuss the reasons for this and provide examples to support my viewpoint.
While risk-takers are against banning life-threatening sports, the rest believe that banning these types of exercises should be immediately applied. In my belief, I firmly disagree with prohibiting dangerous sports.