Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

nowadays, technology
turns
Verb problem
has
show examples
into
Correct article usage
a needs
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needs
Fix the agreement mistake
need
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in every sector of mankind, every
ages
Change to a singular noun
age
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start
Verb problem
apply
show examples
from children to
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
. computer and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
spreading fastly and there are
adventage
Correct your spelling
advantages
advantage
and
disadventage
Correct your spelling
disadvantage
disadvantages
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
it. some people use
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
and
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
in
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
sectors
Fix the agreement mistake
sector
show examples
,
for example
, students are
more close
Replace the words
closer
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
their
gadget
Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
show examples
than books, it
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
really useful because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
they
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
for
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
show examples
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Your current response is missing a clear structure and does not address both views or provide a personal opinion as the task asks.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as firstly, however, in addition) to structure your ideas more clearly and improve the flow of your essay.
development
Develop your ideas more fully. Discuss both viewpoints on the use of technology in education versus traditional methods in schools, and support these ideas with specific examples or reasons.
accuracy
Check your spelling and grammar carefully. There are several errors that could confuse the reader or make your argument less clear.
completeness
Expand on your ideas and provide a more thorough analysis in order to more fully answer the question. A short response cannot fully cover the requirements of the task.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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