Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Your current response is missing a clear structure and does not address both views or provide a personal opinion as the task asks.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as firstly, however, in addition) to structure your ideas more clearly and improve the flow of your essay.
development
Develop your ideas more fully. Discuss both viewpoints on the use of technology in education versus traditional methods in schools, and support these ideas with specific examples or reasons.
accuracy
Check your spelling and grammar carefully. There are several errors that could confuse the reader or make your argument less clear.
completeness
Expand on your ideas and provide a more thorough analysis in order to more fully answer the question. A short response cannot fully cover the requirements of the task.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
I hope this letter finds you in good health. As you know, I recently resigned from my position as Bravo Team Commander in our company, and I'm joining Spectre International Security next month. I'm writing this letter to you to say my farewells and express my gratitude.
These days, the number of individuals who immigrate to metropolises and this factor affects of pollution of the environment. While there are a number of reasons why this is the case, including but not limited to the development of construction and the growth of sharp modes of transport, the problem can be mitigated by the government ought to pay more attention to the building’s standards and the exploitation of fuel-powered transport should be reduced.
In modern society, it is commonly observed that in order to address the problem of student bullying, its causes such as too much focus on outstanding academic performance and competition among students must be clearly understood by society. In this essay, the main causes of the phenomenon and possible solutions will be examined in turn.
In recent years, the debate between traveling abroad versus exploring one’s own country has become a popular topic. While many people enjoy going on international holidays, others believe that domestic travel offers better experiences. Both views have merit and deserve careful consideration.