In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, in some countries, more and more people are preferring
work
before going to
university
.
This
behaviour has positive and negative points, that
this
essay will explain.
Let is
Correct your spelling
Let's
show examples
talk about the advantages
firsty
Correct your spelling
first
firstly
. One of the main pros is the opportunity to know practical aspects of an area of
interesting
Replace the word
interest
show examples
.
For example
, if a person
work
Change the verb form
works
show examples
for a construction company after
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high school, he or she will decide better what course at
university
fits more,
for
instance
Add the comma(s)
instance,
show examples
Engineering or Architecture. Another positive question
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is an opportunity to earn some money and save it.
As a result
, after some years working and making savings, it
possible
Add a missing verb
is possible
show examples
to
aplly
Correct your spelling
apply
for a more famous and expensive tertiary education.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
the other hand, there are some drawbacks. When people
beginning
Wrong verb form
begin
show examples
to
work
earlier and
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
how to do the
work
properly, it can create a lack of motivation to go to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
. The person can
go
Correct your spelling
do
show examples
well in the
job
and guess that higher education is not necessary anymore.
In addition
, some young people can linger to find a good
job
that
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
like
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
or change jobs several times.
Consequently
, they will spend some years
to decide
Change the verb form
deciding
show examples
what course to do at college. In conclusion, there are pros and cons in choosing to enrol in
work
-based training
instead
of attending
university
. In my
opinon
Correct your spelling
opinion
, the good aspects
overpass
Verb problem
outweigh
show examples
the negative issues. Learning a
job
before
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
academic subjects
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can bring more options to decide what course fits more.
However
, it is important to pay attention
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
how long
this
experience will take, and obtain as much information as possible about the
job
to help choose
further
academic knowledge.
Submitted by fmulato on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Ensure a clear, concise thesis statement in your introduction. This helps to guide the reader on what specifically you will be discussing regarding the advantages and disadvantages.
Task Achievement
Each paragraph should open with a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the aspect being discussed, improving the clarity of your main ideas.
Task Achievement
Consider expanding upon your examples with more detail or provide more specific, relevant examples to illustrate your main points. This enriches your argument and supports your viewpoints more thoroughly.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure logical ordering of your paragraphs and ideas. It seems you have a coherent structure, but some transitions between paragraphs could be smoother and more explicit.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on the connectivity of ideas within paragraphs. Using a variety of linking words and phrases can help with the flow of your essay and better connect your ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Review your essay for minor grammatical errors and typos. While they do not significantly detract from readability, addressing them will help present a more polished argument.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-based training
  • enrol
  • university
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • practical skills
  • experience
  • workforce
  • employment
  • earnings
  • opportunities
  • further education
  • theoretical knowledge
  • career options
  • exploitation
  • balance
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!