In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, in some countries, more and more people are preferring
work
before going to university
. This
behaviour has positive and negative points, that this
essay will explain.
Let is
talk about the advantages Correct your spelling
Let's
firsty
. One of the main pros is the opportunity to know practical aspects of an area of Correct your spelling
first
firstly
interesting
. Replace the word
interest
For example
, if a person work
for a construction company after Change the verb form
works
the
high school, he or she will decide better what course at Correct article usage
apply
university
fits more, for
instance
Engineering or Architecture. Another positive questionAdd the comma(s)
instance,
,
is an opportunity to earn some money and save it. Remove the comma
apply
As a result
, after some years working and making savings, it possible
to Add a missing verb
is possible
aplly
for a more famous and expensive tertiary education.
Correct your spelling
apply
One
the other hand, there are some drawbacks. When people Correct your spelling
On
beginning
to Wrong verb form
begin
work
earlier and learning
how to do the Wrong verb form
learn
work
properly, it can create a lack of motivation to go to the
Correct article usage
apply
university
. The person can go
well in the Correct your spelling
do
job
and guess that higher education is not necessary anymore. In addition
, some young people can linger to find a good job
that
like Correct pronoun usage
they
it
or change jobs several times. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Consequently
, they will spend some years to decide
what course to do at college.
In conclusion, there are pros and cons in choosing to enrol in Change the verb form
deciding
work
-based training instead
of attending university
. In my opinon
, the good aspects Correct your spelling
opinion
overpass
the negative issues. Learning a Verb problem
outweigh
job
before studing
academic subjectsCorrect your spelling
studying
,
can bring more options to decide what course fits more. Remove the comma
apply
However
, it is important to pay attention at
how long Change preposition
to
this
experience will take, and obtain as much information as possible about the job
to help choose further
academic knowledge.Submitted by fmulato on
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Task Achievement
Ensure a clear, concise thesis statement in your introduction. This helps to guide the reader on what specifically you will be discussing regarding the advantages and disadvantages.
Task Achievement
Each paragraph should open with a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the aspect being discussed, improving the clarity of your main ideas.
Task Achievement
Consider expanding upon your examples with more detail or provide more specific, relevant examples to illustrate your main points. This enriches your argument and supports your viewpoints more thoroughly.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure logical ordering of your paragraphs and ideas. It seems you have a coherent structure, but some transitions between paragraphs could be smoother and more explicit.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on the connectivity of ideas within paragraphs. Using a variety of linking words and phrases can help with the flow of your essay and better connect your ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Review your essay for minor grammatical errors and typos. While they do not significantly detract from readability, addressing them will help present a more polished argument.
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