You have reccently moved to another city but your bank has your old address and continues to send all the communication there. Write a letter to your bank Branch. In this letter mention: -Where you have moved? -What problem are you facing regarding the bank's communication? -What do you want them to do regarding old communication already sent to the wrong address.

#city #bank #address #communication #branch #-where #-what

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to you

this

purpose about my communications with the

bank

. I have recently moved

Change preposition

to other

show examples

other

Correct quantifier usage

another

show examples

place

This

place

is so far

Change preposition

from

show examples

the

bank

Moreover

, my all communication and

address

Fix the agreement mistake

addresses

show examples

Add a missing verb

are related

show examples

to your

bank

This

is a big issue. I have recently moved

Change preposition

to other

show examples

other

Correct quantifier usage

another

show examples

city

This

city

is so far

Change preposition

from

show examples

the

bank

This

place

Add a missing verb

is in

show examples

city

Add an article

the city

show examples

centre. It is capital. I have

Change the article

show examples

issue. I am suffering to come and go to far distance. I want to the

bank

contacts

relate

Wrong verb form

show examples

to my

currently

Change the adverb

current

show examples

workplace. I am writing to you

Change preposition

show examples

this

aim.

Firstly

, I

wanted

Add the particle

wanted to

show examples

move to

other

Change the wording

another place

other places

show examples

place

. By reason of, in

this

city

Add a comma

city,

show examples

there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a lot of car sound and very much traffics.

Secondly

, I forgot to contact the

bank

However

, If you could help me a bit, I would have solved these problems. I want to pass my all things to my new workplace from my old

bank

. Yours faithfully, Jasur uktamov

Submitted by soglomovsarvar on Sun Mar 24 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure clarity and relevance in each paragraph. Each paragraph should focus on a single aspect of your request or issue. Avoid mixing different ideas in one paragraph.

Coherence & Cohesion

Create a clear logical structure for your letter. Start with an introduction explaining why you are writing, followed by paragraphs each addressing a specific point, and conclude your letter properly.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use paragraphs effectively, ensuring that each new main idea starts in a new paragraph. This helps in maintaining the flow and making your letter easier to follow.

Task Achievement

Clearly state the issue at the beginning of the letter, including the necessary details like your new address, the problem faced due to the address change, and your specific requests to the bank.

Task Achievement

Maintain a polite and formal tone throughout the letter. While your tone is generally appropriate, ensure consistency in formality and politeness.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

165 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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