Some people believe that men and women are equal and so women should be able to do any job they want. Others feel that men and women are not equal and therefore there are certain jobs which are not suitable for women. What is your opinion?

Nowadays, as female power increases, lots of people believe that males and
females
have the same power including family rights, social status and career opportunities.
As a result
, it is generally claimed that
women
should be able to do any job if they want.
However
, others
also
believe that some
jobs
can not be done by
females
,
such
as heavy
jobs
. I personally agree with the idea that
men
and
women
are equal
therefore
they should be able to choose suitable
jobs
for themselves. There are a number of strong arguments to support the idea that not only are some
jobs
suitable for
women
, but
also
be done better by
women
than
men
. Some
jobs
should be carefully done by people
in addition
to
women
having these advantages over
men
.
For instance
, children’s growth needs to be taken care of carefully by
teachers
which is why many female
teachers
in schools. Female
teachers
have patience more than male
teachers
.
Therefore
, they can find some small mistakes and details in the students’ study lives.
Consequently
,
women
do some
jobs
more suitable than
men
.
In addition
, there are some important reasons to agree with the idea that some
jobs
should have some
women
join with.
For example
, it is generally believed that police have heavy
jobs
because they often have to stop crimes.
Therefore
, when policemen meet female crimes, they have some issues
such
as checking bags and searching. If they were
females
at that time, both crimes and police would have been convenient and less embarrassing.
As a result
, some
jobs
should be done by
females
. In conclusion,
women
cannot be defined.
Thus
, they have the right to choose their like
jobs
even though some work may be hard for them. They
also
can try it
in addition
to working hard to do the job.
Submitted by hsmkashi on

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task achievement
To improve Task Achievement, ensure that your essay fully addresses the task prompt by presenting a clear opinion throughout the essay. Incorporate a more balanced discussion of both viewpoints before solidifying your stance in the conclusion. Enhance your essay by specifying your opinion early in the introduction to guide the reader more effectively.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, focus on improving the logical flow between paragraphs by using a wider range of cohesive devices. Transition words such as 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'on the other hand' can help clarify the relationship between ideas. Also, aim to present your ideas more cohesively by ensuring each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by relevant examples or explanations.

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