IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Your friend is thinking about learning to drive and would like some advice. Write a letter to your friend. -Say why a driving license is advantageous. -Recommend a driving school. -Give extra guidance/tips

#friend #drive #advice #-say #license #-recommend #school #-give #guidance #tips
Hi Hilola, To my way of thinking, you are well. I heard
about
Change preposition
that
show examples
 you are thinking about learning to
drive
. I am going to give you useful
advise
Replace the word
advice
show examples
.
First,
you must learn to
drive
 very well.
Importance
Correct article usage
The importance
show examples
 of driving
so
Add a missing verb
is so
show examples
 well big in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. On the occasion of driving badly, appear many
kind
Change to a plural noun
kinds
show examples
 of
accident
Fix the agreement mistake
accidents
show examples
. In case you do not
drive
 , you should go to the driving school. I attended "Drivers" school
last
 year. The best educators teach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
indications for driving. Before I attended
this
 school, my dad used to give me a lift. Nowadays, I
drive
 a car on my own.
Moreover
, my brother helped me to
drive
 too. I even collided with
large
Add an article
a large
show examples
 tree in
way
Add an article
the way
show examples
.
However
, I
did
Verb problem
was
show examples
 not afraid of it. Do you want
I
Correct pronoun usage
me
show examples
 train to you? If you want, write to me as soon as possible. Best wishes, Your
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nearest friend is Shirin.
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on

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Task Achievement
To improve task response, focus on directly responding to the prompts given. Include clear explanations on why a driving license is advantageous, specifically recommend a driving school, and offer detailed guidance or tips. Make sure each part of the task is covered thoroughly.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, ensure that your ideas flow logically from one to the next. Use transition words and phrases to help connect your sentences and paragraphs. Also, try to maintain a single focus within each paragraph to make your writing more structured and easier to follow.
General Advice
For a friendlier tone and a more personal touch, consider using more direct questions or expressions of care. Additionally, pay attention to grammar and punctuation to make your writing clearer and more professional.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • unparalleled
  • flexibility
  • relying
  • enhance
  • employability
  • reputable
  • pass rates
  • experienced
  • comprehensive
  • rapport
  • diligently
  • muscle memory
  • regulations
  • perseverance
  • setbacks
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