Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In today's modern era, a significant portion of people's leisure time is spent being active indoors or outdoors. Outdoor activity usually entails the likelihood of misadventure, resulting in people’s view that
this
dangerous activity should be banned by the government.
However
, other individuals insist that engaging in any sport should be our own freedom.
This
essay will elucidate both of these perspectives. Outdoor
sports
are deemed amusing by certain individuals.
Activities
that are challenging and adrenaline-inducing often attract many enthusiasts, irrespective of the risks they carry.
Therefore
, it should be crucial that these
sports
facilities are well-equipped and undergo multiple inspections to ensure safety. Maximal security efforts should have been made to protect all participants that are involved here.
Furthermore
, it is
also
crucial to do a medical check-up before participating in these
sports
in order to gain specific knowledge about their wellness. It is advisable for people at health risk to avoid risky
activities
as it could possibly exacerbate their health issues.
For
this
reason, determining whether to be involved in any sport should be a personal consideration. Some societies overthink these consequences and propose that governments should intervene to cancel these
activities
. I personally disagree with
this
idea
due to
its disruption of people’s entertainment. As long as they do not harm the environment, there should be nothing to forbid. As for the second opinion, I am inclined towards it, which states that engaging in any activity is a matter of individual freedom. Most of these participants are grown humans and aware of their decisions. They must have deliberated extensively before embarking on these adventures. Ultimately, dangerous
sports
are enjoyable for some individuals and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
should avoid prohibiting these
activities
as it is people’s right to determine their lives.
Submitted by syarahfatiha321 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To improve Task Achievement, ensure that your response directly and comprehensively addresses all parts of the task. Specifically, expand on your examples to illustrate your points more vividly. Bringing in real-world examples or hypothetical scenarios could enrich your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, work on creating a more discernible overall structure by using a wider range of linking words and clear paragraphing. Each paragraph should deal with one main idea, seamlessly connected to the others. Consider using more explicit transition phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion could be strengthened by clearly stating your main argument and summarizing your key points more effectively. A clearer stance in the introduction and a more impactful summation of your perspective in the conclusion can make your essay more persuasive and memorable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • severe injuries
  • fatalities
  • base jumping
  • bull running
  • extreme skiing
  • safeguard
  • well-being
  • regulating
  • avoidable harm
  • healthcare costs
  • burdening
  • personal freedom
  • autonomy
  • training
  • equipment
  • mitigated
  • personal satisfaction
  • mental health benefits
  • resilience
  • adventure
  • assess risks
  • public safety
  • unnecessary healthcare costs
  • outright bans
  • balanced approach
  • stringent safety standards
  • mandatory training sessions
  • adequately informed
  • safeguarding
  • public health
What to do next:
Look at other essays: