Many think that secondary and high school students should learn money management as it is an important life skill. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is widely believed that students in their teens ought to study how
to
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financial
management
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since it is a fundamental
skill
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in
life
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. I strongly concur with that view for a number of reasons which will be outlined in
this
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essay. It is evident that
money
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management
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skill
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skills
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can help teenagers think more critically. Because
this
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skill
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will teach them how to use
money
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efficently
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efficiently
and correctly in any case in their
life
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.
For instance
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, if adolescents are aware of the importance of financial
management
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early, they will be less inclined to buy snacks, toys or trendy items that can only be used once, these goods only bring them temporary joy but can leave negative consequences affecting their health and finances.
Thereby
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Therefore
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, the earlier students are taught
money
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management
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skills, the more beneficial it will be for them in the future because they will have a deep and mature understanding of
life
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and how to properly use
money
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in any case in
life
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.
Moreover
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, financial
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skill
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skills
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can teach young people
gain
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to gain
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early awareness and appreciate the
money
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their parents
work
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hard to earn, as
this
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skill
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will show
they
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them
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how hard it is for adults to
work
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hard to earn
money
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.
This
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will make young people love and appreciate their parents more, thereby making them aware that they should study and
work
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hard to make their parents happy.
However
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, studying financial
management
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skill
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skills
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early can make children stingy, because they will become more careful in using
money
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and sometimes they can be selfish in spending for themselves,
such
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as buying delicious healthy food or going out with friends less to save
money
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.
This
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can make it easy for them to become distant from people, and because not spending
money
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on healthy food will make their bodies susceptible to illness.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, Being aware of
money
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management
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early will make teenagers become more pragmatic, they will only do
work
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that benefits themselves without caring about others. In conclusion, I am of the opinion that
student
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students
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from secondary and high school should be taught about financial
management
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.
Submitted by okookk123456 on

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task achievement
Ensure your essay directly answers the question asked, with a clear position that is maintained throughout.
task achievement
Improve the specificity of your examples. Real-world instances or statistics could help strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating more cohesive paragraphs by linking ideas more clearly. Use cohesive devices (e.g., furthermore, however, for instance) to better connect your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Consider revising for more varied sentence structures to improve readability and engage your reader more effectively.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • essential
  • financial responsibility
  • budgeting
  • saving
  • spending
  • prioritizing expenses
  • debts
  • financial commitments
  • building a secure future
  • academic subjects
  • limited resources
  • financial literacy
  • specialized programs
  • qualified teachers
  • diversity of career paths
  • future opportunities
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