some poeple think that succes in life comes from hard work and deternimation while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance . discuss both view and give your opinion.

#poeple #succes #life #work #deternimation #factors #money #appearance

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Nowadays, many individuals believe that success in

life

Use synonyms

begins with desire and difficult

work

Use synonyms

otherwise

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

think that

based

Add a missing verb

is based

show examples

on factors like income and external.

This

Linking Words

essay agrees that a victorious

life

Use synonyms

comes from

work

Use synonyms

hard and resolution. It must be

regconised

Correct your spelling

recognised

recognized

that

determination

Use synonyms

and hard

work

Use synonyms

are the focus to having a successful career.

In other words

Linking Words

, if

people

Use synonyms

have a

determination

Use synonyms

, they will have many motivation to study or

work

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and gain more knowledge.

For example

Linking Words

, if you want to

admission

Wrong verb form

be admitted

show examples

to the high top rank university in your city, you must have a big stimulation and

hard-working

Correct word choice

hard

show examples

study more than ever.

However

Linking Words

, some opinions claim that money and aspect are the important reason to make a successful

life

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

who have a good appearance can make a positive impression on employers, which is the main factor that can

be help

Change the verb form

help

show examples

them make their lives more successful.

This

Linking Words

point may be true,

however

Linking Words

, the

people

Use synonyms

, who make achievements from their

determination

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are still more noticeable than the

people

Use synonyms

who depend on appearance.

For instance

Linking Words

, when you want to apply to a famous company but you don't have talent and strength, but just have external beauty you will not be accepted because they don't need your beauty, what they need is what you can do for their company. From

this

Linking Words

writer's point of view, I believe that hard

work

Use synonyms

and

determination

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play an important role in a successful

life

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

is because

people

Use synonyms

can not follow their careers if they are not passionate about their jobs.

People

Use synonyms

will not receive anything if they do not

work

Use synonyms

hard. In conclusion, a successful

life

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is based on

people

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determination

Use synonyms

and hard-working process.

Therefore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

essay has proven that the former view is better.

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Task Achievement

Focus on clear and detailed examples to support your points more effectively. Incorporate specific scenarios or data to strengthen your arguments.

Coherence & Cohesion

To enhance coherence, progressively develop your arguments from paragraph to paragraph, ensuring a more logical flow of ideas.

Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure your introduction and conclusion succinctly present and summarize your main arguments to improve their effectiveness.

General Advice

Be mindful of spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Accurate language use will improve clarity and professionalism in your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

295 words

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some poeple think that succes in life comes from hard work and deternimation while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance . discuss both view and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

The average age for individuals to give birth is increasing. Some people think that it will have negative impact on family and country. What is your opinion about this?

Many Offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishments. Why is this happening and what measures can be taken to tackle these problems

Overweight Children In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should be responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that developed countries have a higher responsibility to combat climate change than developing countries. Others believe that all countries should have the same responsibilities towards protecting the environment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?