IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Smacking childern is the best form of discipline To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Indeed, physical punishments are thought to be the best forms of teaching ethics to the younger generations in the past centuries.
However
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,
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
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 slapping your kid is not regarded as a good way to teach rules.
This
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 essay will shed light on my views
that
Change preposition
on
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 why I am against
this
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 activity. To commence with,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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children have very tender minds and they are easily impressionable, if someone
use
Wrong verb form
used
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 to abuse them they will start feeling very low.
Thus
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, it will cause mental problems for them.
For example
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; they will start assuming that they are not loveable and needed anymore.
As a result
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, their self-confidence and sense
to
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of
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 love
themselves
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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will start diminishing.
Thus
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, by preferring their mental health it is not advisable in many countries to beat your little ones.
Besides
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 that, many schools
also
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 promote
this
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 thing by keeping their psychological state in mind.
Moreover
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; the juveniles
holds
Correct subject-verb agreement
hold
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 a great memory, which helps them to learn things quickly and hold it for life -time.
Therefore
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, if the parents spank them for bad habits, they will it and develop a sense of anger in their heart, which resulted in
worst
Correct word choice
worse
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 habits and illegal activities later on.
However
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; many people think that it is best the form to
controlyour
Correct your spelling
control your
 kids but they always
forgot
Wrong verb form
forget
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 that physical punishment can make changes
to
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apply
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anyone's behaviour for
short
Add an article
a short
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 time span and later on they will start doing their regular habits.
Thus
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, it is better to teach them
polietly
Correct your spelling
politely
.
To conclude
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, the authoritarian behaviour of guardians in
form
Correct article usage
the form
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 of hitting can make their kids far away from them emotionally and it
lay
Verb problem
has
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 psychological impacts on their
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
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.
Thus
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, it is better to be their friends and teach them the foundations of life.

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a stronger logical flow between paragraphs. Transition sentences could be sharpened to build a clearer connection between ideas. Moreover, make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea that is expanded upon thoroughly.
task achievement
To enhance task achievement, strive to support your arguments with more specific examples. While the essay presents a clear stance against physical punishment, incorporating study results or anecdotal evidence can make the argument more compelling.
grammar style
Pay careful attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation to avoid distracting errors. Consider using a variety of sentence structures to make your writing more engaging and to demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • discipline
  • smacking
  • punishment
  • behavior
  • childhood
  • communication
  • rebellion
  • consequences
  • alternatives
  • psychological impact
  • constructive
  • authoritarian
  • neglectful
  • abusive
  • controversial
  • divisive
What to do next:
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