IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows how patients evaluated differnet services at three health centres.

The table below shows how patients evaluated differnet services at three health centres.
#patients #differnet #services #three #health #centres
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The table illustrates services evaluation by patients at three
health
Use synonyms
centres
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. Units are measured on a scale of 1-10, from very poor to excellent.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that the most excellent
health
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centre
Use synonyms
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
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 the highest total
score
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. The Peveril
Centre
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 hit the top at 8.3 and the second one is the
Marchbank
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Centre
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 which
obtain
Wrong verb form
obtained
show examples
 7.2.
However
Linking Words
, the Langston
Centre
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get
Wrong verb form
got
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 the lowest
score
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 at 5.8. In terms of how patients evaluated the services among the three
health
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centres
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, there are five aspects: booking appointments, doctors' service, care of children, pharmacy, and response to concern. The first row shows the
score
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 of booking appointments. The Langston
Centre
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gain
Wrong verb form
gained
show examples
 5.2,
while
Linking Words
 the Peveril
Centre
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 and the
Marchbank
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Centre
Use synonyms
 reach higher scores at 9.1 and 7.8 respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the Peveril
Centre
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achieve
Wrong verb form
achieved
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 a higher
score
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 than the two
health
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centres
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 in every aspect. Regarding the other two
health
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centres
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, both of them
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
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 a peak in doctors' services of 8.0 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Longston and 8.4 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Marchbank
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the Longston and the
Marchbank
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 hit a trough at 4.3 and 6.5, respectively, in the aspect of the response to the concern.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words health, centres, centre, score, marchbank with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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