some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as many and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion

According to
some people, if you
work
hard and possess enough
determination
, you will achieve success in life. Others,
however
, insist that money and looks play a greater role in helping a person succeed. In my opinion, both views have their merits
while
good looks or money alone can not help a person succeed, in many factors, hard
work
or
determination
is not sufficient either. When you
work
hard with
determination
, your chances of success increase exponentially.
For example
, students who
work
hard have higher chances of succeeding in competitive exams.
Likewise
, in the field of science and technology, hard
work
and the never say die
sprirt
Correct your spelling
spirit
are the main factors that help a person succeed. A scientist or a
technocraf
Correct your spelling
technocrat
does not have to be handsome or beautiful to succeed.
Likewise
, an entrepreneur, doctor or
lawer
Correct your spelling
lawyer
does not hard to have
attractive
Correct article usage
an attractive
show examples
look. So, obviously, in fields like these hard
work
and
determination
are definitely the key to success.
Furthermore
, there are some who believe money is everything in life, it could help you
famous
Add a missing verb
be famous
show examples
and well-known.
In addition
to being wealthy, being good-looking
also
leads you to the same.
Although
it is somehow correct, in my opinion, there is much less chance of
this
. In view of
this
, we rarely see a wealthy human, who reaches their goal without being dedicated or
whereas
without working brutally before reaching
this
.
Besides
, being affluent without working will eventually lead to failure.
For instance
, a businessman will never succeed only by being rich. In conclusion, everything mentioned and both views are all keys to reaching what you want.
However
, it is all about passion and dedication rather than being good-looking without working hard to succeed.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance the logical structure of your essays, aim to connect ideas more smoothly by using a wider range of linking phrases. This could make transitions between sentences and paragraphs more seamless, adding to the overall coherence.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure the introduction and conclusion of your essays are consistently clear, concise, and effectively summarize your main points. This practice helps to bookend your argument neatly, reinforcing its impact.
Task Achievement
Support each main point with more detailed, concrete examples or evidence. Doing so will strengthen your arguments and make your essays more persuasive and engaging.
Task Achievement
Strive for clarity and depth in presenting your ideas. This means not just stating an opinion, but also elaborating on it in a way that clearly communicates your reasoning and connects with the reader.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: