In today’s world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantage of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

#today’s #world #people #smartphone #advantage

These days certain individuals all over the world,

people

are using their own

smartphones

. I think to

use

them it right way more and more prons. In

this

essay, I will discuss about it On the one hand, nowadays individual

people

are using

smartphones

. it can be used in many ways for the

people

. but they have more benefits if they can be used the right way. It has a variety of facilities like social media, education, communication with each other, etc.

For instance

, If someone needs to find a location for anywhere they can

use

them very easily to fit it.

Moreover

, someone who studies another language can

use

Google search or YouTube. Today it is very popular

learning

Wrong verb form

to learn

show examples

anything from

smartphones

For example

, during the COVID pandemic time, the school closed and they were taught online with

smartphones

Therefore

, I think

smartphones

outweigh and it is used by

people

more and more prons On the

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

hand, some of them like a teenager

use

some bad habits and do not want to take its benefits. They overuse it like social media more than education.

As a result

, they are addicted to it and they do not want to get an education.

For example

, if they take their hand for a smartphone they can try to play video games or communicate with friends. In conclusion,

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

can

use

prons

Correct your spelling

pros

show examples

than cons. If it

use

Wrong verb form

is used

show examples

right

Correct article usage

the right

show examples

ways.

Therefore

, I think it has more advantages

people

Change preposition

than people

show examples

use

Correct pronoun usage

who use

show examples

Correct your spelling

smartphone

smartphones

smartphon

Correct your spelling

smartphones

Submitted by ma.ushamanu1024 on Sun Mar 31 2024

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Specific Examples

Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. While you have included examples, adding detail can make your points clearer and more compelling.

Sentence Structure

Consider varying your sentence structures more to enhance the readability of your essay. Varied sentence structures can make your writing more engaging for the reader.

Thesis Statement

Work on developing a clearer thesis statement in your introduction. A clearly defined thesis guides the reader through your argument more effectively.

Balanced Argument

Your essay presents a balanced view by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of smartphone use.

Effective Conclusion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your position, reinforcing the message of your essay.

Relevant Examples

You have made relevant use of examples, such as referencing online education during the COVID pandemic, to support your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

248 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Accessibility
Instantaneous
Social networking
Navigation
Digital payments
Distraction
Productivity
Cybersecurity
Ergonomics
Addiction
Data privacy
Prolonged exposure
Blue light
Cognitive impact
Screen time

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In today’s world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantage of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree

Completing university is thought be some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Many employers believe that good social skills are as important as good qualifications to succeed in a job, so they are employing people who are with good social skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Research into new types of medicine and treatments are essential for improving health and deal with diseases. Who do you think should fund these researchers: private companies, individuals or governments?