IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone in five different age groups in the USA between 1850 and 2000.

#bar #percentage #people #five #different #age #groups #usa
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
Bar Chart depicts the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 of individuals living on their own
amoung
Correct your spelling
among
 various
age
Use synonyms
 groups in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
during
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1850 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of all
age
Use synonyms
 groups
living
Wrong verb form
lived
show examples
 alone in 2000
where as
Correct your spelling
whereas
show examples
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
group
Use synonyms
 55 to 64
leading
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 the living alone percentage all
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
. In 1850 only
people
Use synonyms
 above 37 years and above were living alone.
However
Linking Words
 but 1900
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 27 to 36 started living alone and living alone
age
Use synonyms
 continued to lower to
17
Correct article usage
the 17
show examples
 to 26
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
 by 1950.
People
Use synonyms
 from
55
Correct article usage
the 55
show examples
 to 64
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
was
Verb problem
had
show examples
 the highest percentage in all four periods followed by
47
Correct article usage
the 47
show examples
 to 54
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
. from 1900 to 1950, the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 of
people
Use synonyms
 living alone
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 55 to 64 has doubled and by 2000, it has
further
Linking Words
 doubled from 1950.
Use synonyms
Age
Correct article usage
The age
show examples
group
Use synonyms
 47 to 54 remained
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 same range from 1850 to 1950 but
seen
Wrong verb form
saw
show examples
 a significant increase in 2000. 27 to 36
age
Use synonyms
group
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 living alone had slightly increased from 1900 to 1950 and show
remarkable
Add an article
a remarkable
show examples
 increase in 2000 from 3 to 8.
Submitted by sajee_5 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, group, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: