More and more people tend to watch foreign movies, so the local government should encourage the development of local film industry. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, the majority of young people and others in society all over the
global
Correct your spelling
globe are

The word global doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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watching foreign
films
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
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apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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,rather than local
films
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the local state should support
to
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apply

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the
develop
Replace the word
development

The word develop doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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that trade in any country.I completely agree with
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

notion and I will support my opinion with examples.
Firstly
Linking Words

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, most film followers watch other countries' movies considerably
highest
Replace the word
higher

The word highest doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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than local ones.But the authority should encourage the artist
create
Add the particle
to create

It appears that the verb create should be in the to-infinitive form. Consider adding the word to.

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a
Change the article
the

It appears that the phrase a best quality product does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

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best quality product with the latest technology.If it may bring considerable income to own country.As an example,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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aid
Correct subject-verb agreement
aids

It seems that the verb aid does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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to use
the
Change preposition
of the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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latest technology in American
films
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, and Hollywood and Bollywood
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

use 3D
films
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
As a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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many views have been seen that kind of cinema product in the future. Another reason why I agree with the state ,
build
Verb problem
is

There may be a verb use issue here.

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that the
government
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may develop more facilities for cinemas
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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, anywhere.Take an example, there are significant of young people habit to go
on
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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high-quality cinemas with their friends and families.The public prefers to shop,
eat
Correct word choice
and eat

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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food and beverages like that in the cinema theatre.
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Furthermore. Consider adding a comma.

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I strongly believe that
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it may make more attractive and marvellous.Humans more and more come and spend time in the fillhalls. What is more ,regimes supply eligible resources,and funds from
budget
Add an article
the budget

The noun phrase budget seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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to develop their film production respectively
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

most followers gather around which local industry. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

it is a common belief that a high amount of mankind watch foreign movies if the
government
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

support the local film industry to develop their product it increases the number of views in the local country
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

.Personally,I think the
government
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

encourage industry it grow
up
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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efficiently.

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Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance coherence, ensure your essay flows logically from one idea to the next. Use clear, connecting phrases and make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
Task Achievement
For a more comprehensive response, expand your ideas further with detailed explanations and varied sentence structures to improve readability.
Task Achievement
Incorporating specific examples strengthens your argument. Ensure these examples are clearly linked to the points you are making and explore them in detail.
Task Achievement
You have successfully addressed the topic and provided a relevant argument throughout your essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well structured, effectively setting up your essay's argument and summarizing your stance, respectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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